Casey

judgement for needing time off

From the end-of-season call, I have realized that there is this thought/belief that I have had over the summer. And I have been pushing it away, only writing about it now. One of the things I wanted this summer was rest and breading space because the last semester last study year was an intense one. …

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Fantasy bonding

Dear coaches, I have always had a very rich fantasy. Already as a child I was living in my fantasy worlds and often acted out certain situations and scenarios. I never really spoke to anyone about it because it is connected to a deep feeling of shame and a fear of being told (again) that …

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Discomfort stress response

Hello, I think this thought ‘I shouldn’t have to deal with this’ is underlying how i show up in life and I’m not sure why it is there. I have an immidate stress response whenever I encounter it and wonder why I’m so closed to discomfort. For example if I’ve a task at work that …

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Finding my goal p3

Hi, So I’ve worked a lot with getting through the challenge of first finding my goal, which was to produce my own music, then doing it and now passing it on to other people/ showing it. Basically I decided to focus on making one song that I felt was up to the standard quality/ sound …

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Feeling chosen

I have identified some long held thoughts that are impacting my self-worth around relationships. The first is that I consider myself a ‘filler’ or ‘placeholder’. I read these terms in some romance stories. They referred to three categories of women that men look for. When they are young they want women to ‘have some fun …

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Disappointment over grades

I have been struggling with very strong feelings after getting dissapointing grades for an exam and two essays. While I got some excellent grades for other exams and essays as well, I can’t seem to shift the shame, disappointment and sadness I feel for the worse results. I know that I have attached my self-worth …

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Decision-making

Hi there, I have just received some fantastic news that my application for an artist residency has been accepted. I am so so pleased about it and very excited and proud that I even applied because to my knowledge they usually choose professional artists. Now, my default brain/body still goes to ‘be happy, but not …

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Working from home with kids

I struggle a lot with working from home while my kids are present. They can play for hours if I’m not doing anything that requires focus, but the moment I sit down with my laptop/phone my kids lose all ability to play by themselves. They want to climb on top of me and will interrupt …

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Processing a divorce

Hi coaches, my partner of eleven years and I split up over a year and a half ago and because of some admin faff the divorce has not yet been fully finalised. I notice that I am holding a lot of tension about it and that I react very strongly whenever my ex-partner sends a …

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Moving confusion

Hello coaches, So my family and I (Husband and 6 year old) have decided it’s time to move house. There are a few reasons for this, but briefly one is that we live in a very open plan home (so want more individual spaces for a greater sense id independence) and we are looking for …

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Start exercising

Hi, I’ve been recovering from burn-out/ long-covid and also have a very light (looks almost like disappearing) period. I have gotten the advice from a health care proffesional (chinese medicine) to combine the herbs with some light exercise. I can’t put myself to doing it. I feel very tired since I’m now also working fulltime …

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Working less hours Prt2

When I look at my reasons to cut back hours I see emotions such as: overwhelm. When I look at my reasons to not cut back hours I see emotions such as: fear of rejection/fear of financial loss. You said ‘you know what you want, trust yourself.’ That is true. I want to work less …

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Relationship with my mun

Hello, I would love some coaching on my relationship with my mum. In my 20’s we used to be so close and then since me having children in my 30’s it’s changed our relationship. I thought it would bring us closer – bonding over motherhood. But I feel this wedge between us on how differently …

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Career Change Pt. II

I wrote several months ago about considering a career change from environmental advocacy into health coaching – and received coaching on black and white thinking and how it could be possible to be an environmental advocate AND a health coach. I’ve thought about the ways I could do both… Firstly, during coaching training, I will …

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My new neighbours

Two months ago I had new neighbours move in next door they have a dog. I’ve only met the dog a few times. They are currently renovating the house and they are living in the caravan, situated on the driveway by the house. To get to my house you have to walk in between the …

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Approaching unemployment

Hi AAC, Thanks in advance for reading this. I’m at a point where my fixed term contract (FTC) at work is coming to an end (in 3 weeks) and I don’t have my next job lined up or any income stream, I’m therefore approaching a period of unemployment for the first time in my life …

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Being annoyed by Partner

Hey Coaches! I am working on a model about a classic situation where my partner chews loudly and eats fast, which makes me feel annoyed. UNINTENTIONAL: C: Partner chews loudly T: That is gross F: Disgusted A: Ask him to stop eating so fast A: Get angry at him A: Leave the room in a …

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Working two jobs

Hello wonderful coaches, I’ve been going up and down, and back and forth with this one: I’ve been working 3,5 days (spread over 4 days) per week the last 6 months, on two different jobs (one as a teacher in high school, the other at an art institution). And really enjoyed starting slow on Monday …

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Treat my body better part 2

“Where do you think your relationship is with them now?” separate, clinical, mistrusting “Where do you want it to be?” kind, caring, trusting, appreciative, integrated I want to move from tolerating to liking it, to give my body nice things too.,not just functional things like medication. To see it in a loving integrated way. To …

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How to practice wanting

Hi! I recently decided to quit my job and focus on my business. It has been running for a few years but developing slowly. Now I feel ready to work on it more intensely and there comes a great freedom and excitement with it. Also some anxiety but my main thought is “I am doing …

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DOS Daddy Issues #3

Hi 😊 thank you again for the wonderful, supportive coaching! “What if that’s a natural part of this process?” This made me reframe the discomfort and cognitive dissonance as “growing pains” which is a strategy I love. Aka, that it’s evidence I am shifting models and that “what I’m doing is working”. “Are you willing …

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Taking on Others’ Moods

I am very sensitive to other people’s feelings and emotions and always want to do the “right thing” by others and be considerate to how they are feeling, but it can be to my own detriment. Even potential issues of conflict between others make me anxious. For example in my housemate group Whatsapp chat, if …

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Fear of saying no and sex

Hi coaches. I’m back with something I’ve been coached on before that came up in today’s coaching call with Maisie and also because I’m entering autumn, when the fears and doom and gloom often start creeping in. I’ve been coached before about going into a stress response when I worry or think my partner is …

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Unwinding deeply held beliefs

Hello, I would love some help in using thoughtwork for those nasty thoughts that actually go back decades. They are ones I didn’t even know were there until these last few years of self-development work, but I feel stuck and like I’m making no progress with them. And often it’s as though they are under …

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Job insecurities

Hi, I’m a creative and last year I struggled for money so I managed to get some work with my dads (small) software company after sending a message to the boss and proposing things I could do to improve their social media and overall marketing presence. We did a video/ photo shoot with them, and …

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Boundaries and when to say no

In January, I agreed to participate in a 10min roundtable discussing work that I was involved in. At the time, I asked the organiser to contact me in May to discuss plans and confirm participation. Last Friday, I received an email regarding the event and found that my contribution appears to be a 90min lecture …

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giving away my power

I have noticed in a lot of situations recently that giving away my power to external forces in times of uncertainty. When stressed or unsure I often have thoughts like if I ask for an accommodation and time change I will probably just feel bad at that moment and get a bad grade, if I …

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Being passive and avoidant

Hey Coaches, I started a new job recently and my probation period has been extended due to my performance not being up to standard, according to my manager. I thought that things had been going well and as far as I could see there was no reason for concern, because no concerns had been addressed …

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Finding my goal P2

Hi, Thanks for your response. I decided since after doing the summer workshop to start producing music myself, and focused on making one song sound great, rather than the quantity. There’s been a lot of thoughts come up around me doing this, one of which is “my management don’t want me to do this, and …

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No Hobby part 2

“When you were painting as a child, what did you think about you, about the art? How did you feel? If you can embody those thoughts and feelings again now, what sounds fun or interesting?” Hi there! Actually I didn’t had thoughts when painting as a child. I just DID! Now as a adult I …

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