Thank you this was so helpful. Here’s what I’ve got: My reasons for not exercising are that I don’t feel motivated to do it and it feels like a waste of time. My reasons for exercising are that it is good for me. I’d like to move my body by pottering around, going out on …
Hello Coaches, I wanted to ask you about a model I have been experimenting with. I wondered if you could provide me with some feedback or questions I could ask myself in order to think differently about the issue? Where am I or am I not taking appropriate responsibility? Am I being treated poorly or …
Hi coaches! I’ve been thinking a lot about my spring goal and it’s all a muddle for me. I’m creating results in lots of areas I’ve quit one job so I’ve more time and space for me/studying/my business. So I feel things are falling in to place and will even more so when I’ll work …
Dear coaches, I have a short question about my BBT. I’m measering my tempature now for a while. And the last 2,5 months I’ve tempatures under the 36 celcius. To be exact 9 days from the 2.5 months was under the 36 celcius and the lowest was 35.45 celcius. Maisie is writing in her book …
Dear Ask a Coach, I have started to practice intuitive eating since the beginning of the year to fully overcome my eating disorder and create a healthier relationship with myself and my body. I am currently in the ‘practicing food neutrality’ and ‘honouring your hunger’ phase, which is quite challenging for me because I am …
Body image / Intuitive eating / deeply-rooted beliefs Read More »
I’ve been noticing a big connection more and more with how low I feel and how hard I am on myself when I feel like I’m in a period of low energy and “bad habits”. I go through stages of really low energy (not connected to health – all blood tests etc are normal), don’t …
Dear coaches My word for 2023 is self-love which I’ve been using as monthly goals to prioritise my physical, emotional and mental health. As part of that, I gave up Slimming World which although had previously helped me lose 1 stone, I had slowly put back on and was increasing my feelings of guilt and …
C: I’ve been on sick leave from work for several months with consecutive viral illnesses/bacterial infections. I am not doing my usual activities because of symptoms and fatigue T: I am a burden to my husband F: worthless A: buffer with scrolling, talk about how much of a burden I feel to close friends, find …
Hi, I am feeling particularly overwhelmed at the moment and I’m noticing its affecting many areas of my life. I am working on my business and feel like I’m making little progress as I see what others are doing in a similar field and worry I’m not up to it…then that my website isn’t good …
I’ve been on a journey with my weight since joining the Flow Collective six months ago and I believe I’ve made some progress in unlearning much of the body hatred I’ve carried around (as shown in my two previous Ask a Coach queries). I still am not able to make enough time for yoga as …
I am struggling with motivation and will power when choosing what snacks to eat. One of my rocks to work towards a larger goal of HEALTH for myself is to change my relationship with sugar. I am addicted to sugar. I am successfully changing the main meals that I eat and have had a successful …
Hey coaches! A flow-er friend prompted me to send this for coaching after I shared with her! roughly, I’m training for a powerlifting competition in May, so I want to set myself up for success by putting in the work AND I don’t want to make myself miserable in the pursuit of my goal. It …
I binge eat. depending on the severity I am in so much pain/feeling too nauseous/tired to do anything. I am currently in contact with specialist help, but I would also like to use thought work to help me address specific triggers as I think sometimes it can be a tool to become incapacitated to avoid …
I’m coming back to ask a coach from having reread my previous question on Losing Weight. Thank you for your kindness and generosity. The intentional model I came up with (starting with my result line) is: Circumstance: Doing Yoga ANY TIME Thought: I am worthy of movement Feeling: Relief Action: I remember that I love …
I have been taking steps to become an intuitive eater as I want to not feel rubbish about how I look. It’s been going well and all in all I have felt okay. However I cannot help look at myself in photos and feel terrible about the way I look, ive cleansed my social media …
My partner and I are trying to conceive. I found out last spring that I have polycystic ovaries and I was prescribed Letrozole to stimulate ovulation. Since I started the Letrozole treatment in November, I’ve ovulated twice, which is exciting. If I don’t get pregnant in the next few months though, my OBGYN is likely …
The previous week, I took several massive, imperfect actions to get closer toward my goal for 2023 – to move to a new country and to find a job in a new industry. This is a special goal for me because the reason behind it is simply that I want to do this. It’s entirely …
Hi again! Thank you so much for your response. It was very helpful and put a different perspective on what I am trying to do. Here is what I have come up with: Goal: To learn to love myself (the real me) #1 – Physical Health – Train to run one mile without stopping by …
Hi coaches, I am focusing on resting more and taking life at a slower pace as my body and mind need to heal. I am finding it very difficult not to go at my usual speed and level because both the speed and the level as well as a certain efficiency are very baked into …
Hi coaches, I look part in the recalibrate and activate workshop which was so eye opening and helpful. As a new member, I wanted to run through my goal for this year to get your feedback and check I’m on the right path. The 3 results I’d like to create in 2023 are: 1. to …
I realised my last submission was all over the place (I think it represents how scattered I feel at the moment) so I have done a new one. Just catching up on the winter workshop and now am reaching out for some goal guidance. A lot of Anna’s coaching resonated with me. I realised I …
Hi there, I need a little bit of help. I have been aware that I have an addiction to sugar for a long time. I have gone through phases of cutting sugar out following detoxes etc but it has always come back. I’m at a point now where I don’t think the food/drink itself is …
Hello! I am having trouble finalizing my goal and rocks for the year. I was diagnosed with autism about a year and a half ago and have been working on unmasking and figuring out who I am. I want this year to be about really knowing myself and loving that person. I am stuck on …
Hiya I’m 6 weeks into chemotherapy for breast cancer which was diagnosed in November and feeling like I’ve been hit by a steam train most days. Usually very active and optimistic about the day ahead or future plans, it’s taken me by surprise as I can usually dust myself off and dig deep to face …
Staring at the future like a rabbit in headlights Read More »
I really want to change my relationship with exercise, and get fit and strong. I feel like there have been so few periods of my life where I have actually had a regular, healthy exercise regime. I have low cardio fitness now and I am not very strong. My usual exercise is a daily walk …
I’m getting stuck on which goal I should choose. I got to a place last year where I began to make decisions more clearly and knew what I wanted. But after having some time away from TFC I now feel like I’ve gone back to square one and feel scattered again. I don’t know whether …
Hello, It was interesting to read another question about pregnancy as a goal, coming out of the Recalibrate and Activate workshop. I’ve likewise been hesitating about having a baby as a goal for this year – I’m on my own, and embarked on an IVF journey last year, and had no luck with 5 cycles. …
Pregnancy as a goal with out putting pressure on my body Read More »
Wow, well the coaching felt very eye-opening when you asked which part of me I am believing is real – the part with stage fright or the part that is delivering the class. It really got me thinking about what ‘real’ actually is. Objectively the more ‘real’ me is the one teaching. After all that’s …
Sometimes I feel like I’m going around in circles with the same thing regarding my career, and each week I seem to go through the same worries. I really want to start making some changes in my mindset because in most other areas of my life I am feeling pretty good and work feels like …
I have an on going problem with binge eating. I go through phases of it being manageable and being more out of control. Before the binge eating started I lost weight using a book by Dr Beck, which used CBT to help you change your eating habits rather than dieting and I ‘took it too …
I got a very juicy one for you. I was doing a model on a specific thing that popped in my mind when I saw a creator I follow on Instagram. This creator is going through very similar things in their life as me, including potentially changing careers to a field I am currently changing …
Hey coaches! This week, I had a few moments of disappointment over circumstances that I caused myself. The first involved spilling oil on the couch (and staining it), and the second involved wearing a mascara that ran on my cheeks (and not noticing through a dinner with people I wanted to impress). These are super …
Hello! I would like coaching about considering stopping taking an antidepressant (SSRI) medication. I have discussed this with my doctor who has essentially said that it is up to me, so I want to make sure my reasoning for either continuing or stopping the medication is strong. I want to stop taking the medication mostly …
Hi I’ve come up with a goal for this season and would really like some coaching on my rocks. My word of the year last year was nourishment and I loved working with this. This year my word is free. I’m finding that I’m finding it hard to believe I can do and then sticking …
Hi lovely coaches. I’d like your input on something that’s been happening for a while. I started playing volleyball in a club in September 2022 and it has been one of my biggest motivations. I have always done sports (climbing, dancing, gymnastics…) but never as part of a team. It is also a great opportunity …
Hello, I’m a new member and really excited to be here. This year has been one of major shifts for me. Earlier this year I went through some difficult friendship conflicts that led me to seriously reconsider my relationship with myself, I started therapy, and have been committed to building self-trust and resiliency as I …
Insomnia and anxiety keep creeping back in. My teenage kids go through phases of struggling in their lives, the most recent is a spell of depression with my 16-year-old daughter. I get anxious and can’t sleep at night worrying. I have struggled with insomnia for over 10 years during my perimenopause and menopause. Whilst worrying …
Anxiety keeps creeping back in and keeping me awake Read More »
It’s been difficult for me to get myself out of the house, I used to do it before the pandemic because of work, meeting with friends and going to yoga classes even though it was really hard, but I’d do it because I was struggling with depression and I knew I had to do it …
Hello lovely coaches, Happy new year! Straight to the topic: I worked very hard from mid november until christmas. Through the years, I think I got my system used to stand relatively short high intensity stretches of work, and I suspect my body learnt how to not really give signs of tiredness (or maybe I …
After doing a thought download it was very clear that I find it really hard to look at in other people. I can cope with spinach in someones teeth, but I’ve always been put off by seeing someone eating with their mouth open for example, including excess saliva around the mouth. I wrote down: looks …
I am going to be in my winter around Christmas, and I am going to be visiting my partners family with my partner. I am concerned because they often have a different schedule than I am used to. It is common for them to eat dinner at what I consider to be a late time, …
I’ve been struggling with this for years. I feel very self conscious when I’m talking to other people, like colleagues , certain friends, people I’ve not met before. I worry that I will have white saliva at the edges of my mouth and I am constantly wiping my mouth with my hand just incase. This …
I’ve not sent anything to ask a coach yet, apologies if this is a bit messy. I feel I am scared to commit to new habits. I joined TFC to support perimenopausal symptoms. I fell I resist trying the general fixes – Mainly dietary changes, or I try but don’t last more than a couple …
Hi coaches, this is quite a vulnerable one for me to write to you about, but I have a feeling it’s going to be helpful so here goes nothing O.O I struggle to relax and let go during sex, alone or with a partner, and I have never had an orgasm. There is still a …
I had braces as a teenager, but never wore my retainer (so much regret here!) and my teeth have become wonky. I am very self conscious about this. Last week I took action and went to the dentist to find out how much it would cost to get them sorted, they quoted me £4000 for …
My relationship to movement has improved a lot, I now exercise in ways that I enjoy, to make myself feel good and care for my health. This year I have been trying to sustainably build up the amount of aerobic exercise I do to meet the weekly guidelines but I have had some setbacks with …
I have so many emotions around this topic and it’s taken me weeks to build up the courage to ask a coach about it. I mainly feel embarrassment at the topic because it seems so obviously not ok to ask a coach about my weight. I have had a complicated journey with my weight. I …
My partner doesn’t exercise, take care of their body. I never noticed or minded as I didn’t either. Now I run and am very fit. It bothers me and affects my desire for him/pride in him. It is not that there has been any change in him, but the change has been in me. I …
It really helped me that you clarified that I was stuck between two models. These are the ones I think they were: C: Decreased sexual desire for husband T: My marriage is over if I am not attracted to him F: Anxiety/fear A: – I notice myself drawn to other men – I self stimulate …
Hello coaches I’m finding it very emotional to deal with the fact that I have osteoporosis as a result of a severe eating disorder. I’ve been in recovery for about six years now and had several bone scans over the last nearly 10 years. Although my bone density has improved it’s still in the osteoporosis …
Hi – for a long time I’ve found other people’s comments about diet culture very activating to my (in recovery) eating disorder neural pathways. I know lots of useful thoughts to use in these situations such as ‘most people know very little about nutrition’; ‘this doesn’t apply to me’; ‘I know what I need’ etc. …
Hey 🙂 I’d like help creating a model for my thoughts/beliefs about my body/health, and this (un-true) idea that I have about myself as someone who subconsciously self-sabotages and therefore feeds into this idea of self-fulfilling prophecies — ie. I worry that something is inherently wrong with my body and that I have some underlying …
TW: eating disorder and weight talk Hello, I have recently recovered from an eating disorder and have been used to restricting nutrition for a very long time. Whenever I give my body what it needs in terms of food (eg. I am craving a cookie, so have a cooke VS in the past craving a …
Hi, I’m having a tough time with my health at the moment, it is looking likely I have an autoimmune condition, on top of recently being diagnosed with EDS and being referred for assessment for ADHD. I’m struggling daily with the symptoms and with fear around what the future will hold. I’ve been doing a …
I just went to the sauna, which was the first time in a while that I really looked at and sat with my body in a bikini. When I looked down at my thighs, I was very sure that I must have gained weight. I haven’t exercised as much as I typically do over the …
Hello – I’m frustrated at my continuing inability to feel acceptance and compassion towards myself when I pick up a sports injury. I have a history of anorexia and have had problems with overexercise in the past. I’m still quite dependent on it and my relationship with exercise is definitely a work in progress. Often …
I am hoping to get some help with some difficulties I am having. I feel that I am finding my mid 40s a difficult time. I have always enjoyed being active – mainly running and had ankle surgery 1 year ago which has stopped me being able to run like I used to. I’m still …
Hi coaches! I notice a recurring thought/feeling/action cycle that crops up whenever I come across mainstream diet information that contradicts the way that I eat. I am very purposeful with my diet, and I really aim to eat in a way that I think serves my short term and long term health. When conventional health …
Fear of being duped by alternative health information Read More »
Good morning, After doing the emotion call with Maisie, my gut found a new autumn goal : to invite balance into my life I have recently recovered from an eating disorder and worked a lot on rest, eating more and doing less sport. I went to therapy and sat with a lot of emotions. I …
I really enjoyed the reset replay and the Autumn workshop and am wanting support with the following which is something I find so tricky.. In the past 2 years I have followed a ‘diet’ that took 8 months to get me to lose 4 stone of excess weight and get to a healthier place. Since …
I’d like some help with this model and situation. My mum is doing a two week personalised health study looking at blood sugar, how the body responses to fat etc with a temporary implant. She’s been talking to me about it. I have some knowledge about this area as I had gestational diabetes in both …
I started taking the contraceptive pill in my teens, took it for ten years and then swapped it for a copper coil about ten years ago. My intention was to live more “naturally” and the hope was that my migraine would improve. Now I’ve had two children and the coil put back in after both …
Hi coaches, I’d love some help on my autumn goal. It’s “befriend my inner critic”. I’ve lately started to become more aware of how much my inner critic runs / ruins my life. This part of me divides any activities I do in my free time into worthwhile (exercise; practising my musical instruments; even socialising, …
I have always felt ‘lazy’, I’ll have great intentions to do something yet when it comes to it, I just don’t bother. And when I try to identify that feeling at that moment apart, the best way I can describe it is ‘I can’t be arsed’. My summer loving goal and rocks are a perfect …
Since moving abroad two years ago, my body has changed a lot and I am struggling to accept my weight gain as a neutral fact about me. I also tend to overeat when I am dealing with difficult feelings which there are a lot of, as both of my parents are very ill and I …
My mother-in-law is having some major health issues, some of which can be controlled with lifestyle changes. I have made many changes to my diet and lifestyle over the past few years and living healthy is a big part of who I am and what I enjoy learning about. I love my mother-in-law and it’s …
Thank you so much for your helpful coaching, It has really cleaned it up for me. Here are my models on this 2 un intentionals and 2 intentionals, would love your thoughts. C: I practice yoga once or twice a fortnight. T: Its not enough. A: Procrasinate, I withdraw from the practice, I compare myself …
Being ok with not practicing my usual yoga practice part 2 Read More »
Hello , so I have practiced yoga for 16 years and it has always been at the forefront of my wellbeing. It saved my life. I began to practice a method called Ashtanga and spiritually and emotionally I grew beyond what i thought possible. I then got qualified to teach Yoga and decided that this …
Being ok with not practicing my usual yoga practice. Read More »
Thanks for all the help so far! Here I go with the new model:) C: Looking at pictures of myself T: I want to come home to myself E: compassion/softness A: view myself through the lense of looking at someone I love, look for smiles in the pictures, am I having a good time, saying …
My summer goal is to get to know and accept myself. My rocks are to celebrate myself daily (not just success or progress), spend time connecting with my emotions and sensations in my body and to self-coach, particularly on ‘need to fix me’ thoughts. When my pain and fatigue levels are tolerable, I’m having some …
Hi, I would love some advice on talking about bodies and beauty to my children. Over the last 6 months I have done a lot of work on myself in terms of accepting my body shape. I am probably in the best frame of mind I have ever been about my body (but still working …
I feel terrible when I see pictures of myself C: seeing pictures of myself T: You look gross E; shame A: trying to find out if I really look like that, spiraling, feeling embarrassed, checking to see if people like me, questioning my worth, overeating, R: I talk badly to myself I´ve gained some weight …
Hi! I´ve had on my mind for a while that I want to deal with my thoughts about food and eating. I’ve been putting it of, sort of hoping that it’s just normal. But I’ve realized that I can’t really compare myself to my girlfriends on this, because they might be struggling too. I’ve been …
I have fibromyalgia and ADHD. I have been managing my fibromyalgia for 5 years and was only diagnosed with ADHD in January 2022 and consequentially started medication. It helped my fibromyalgia exponentially as it didn’t take so much energy to concentrate and my fatigue became minimal. Last year, I believed I could never work a …
This one is going to be about comparing to people who are superior in anything that I want to achieve/ would like to do. Specifically concerning athleticism, physical skills etc., as this is something that really excites me and that is a big part of my life. Sometimes seeing other females doing acrobatics, really strong …
Comparison and feelings of non-enoughness, hopelesness Read More »
Hello, I have struggled for many years with disordered eating and body image. I decided for the summer to work on my anxiety around food and my body. My goals is : befriending my body My rocks are: – Letting go of counting my food and the idea of losing weight – Focusing on fun …
Hello, I’m looking for some help with a model please, thanks I started with my action line… A: i eat lots of junk food F before I eat lots of junk food: overwhelmed, things getting too much so I’ve shut down, tired, zoned out, head hurts. R after eating junk food: I feel lethargic, tummy …
Feeling a bit all over the place – constantly tired, anxious, seem to spend my days sorting the kids out/looking after puppy/doing washings/making meals- but so bored of it all, feel sick, cook healthy meals but eat loads of junk food too, very distant from husband and probably kids too, brain fog, headaches, muscles always …
Hello there, I am struggling with some negative thoughts and emotions after my sports training today. I came straight home and went to the thought models to try to understand what is going on but I might need your help. I will give a bit of background to this situation and then try to apply …
Shame and lack of confidence (when playing sports) Read More »
Hi there! I just answered a survey question and wanted to pop it in here too. I have a set of changes I want to make that, when I’ve made them in the past, have a profound impact on my life. Simple health habits I’m strict on with my kids: no sugar before bed, early …
Hello! I am reaching out for some new perspectives on how to approach a sticky pattern around food timing that is meaning I persistently put my body into hypoglycaemia. I am recovering from anorexia, and while this year, I have really transformed and found a lot of freedom from that – to an extent I …
Approaching food timing – blood sugar and staying safe Read More »
I joined the Flow Collective to take better care of myself and to change some of my harmful beliefs. For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been trying really hard to speak kindly to myself. I thought I was doing well until last night (post ovulation dip?) – I saw a video with me in …
Hi, I’ve just found a new UM that has been rearing its head and is pushing me off track, it’s a bit jumbled in my head at the moment. C Being clothes size X T I don’t want people to see me this size F Ashamed/Embarrassed A Avoid social situations A Default to laying on …
Hello! I am looking for some support with a thought and behaviour which I have had ever since childhood, but had never consciously picked up on until now. I am very long-sighted and so since I was a toddler have always had to wear very strong prescription glasses which in my mind make my eyes …
Hello, Thanks for your response to my last ask a coach submission. I have answered your questions but still a bit stuck as to how to move forward… Here are my answers. 1. What does feeling comfortable in my body mean? – feeling less sensitive and super-charged about my body – feeling neutral/light-hearted towards it …
I’d like feedback on the following. The unintentional models came out with very similar actions and I’m not sure if I need to come up with three re-framed/intentional models or if one (which I think covers all) is enough. Thanks in advance! Unintentional models C: I had a breast reduction operation 3 weeks ago: …
Massive action week is looming and I am feeling a bit stuck with how to go about it. My goal that I set was to build a better relationship with myself and to feel comfortable in my body. My rocks are: 1. Find something to love about myself everyday that I can agree with. 2. …
Hi, coming back to AAC as the last one has really helped. Also stole some bits from another members coaching! I get stuck in the same unintentional models every Autumn and wondered if you could help me refine them, and the intentional one: C I’m overweight T It’s not fair I have so many issues …
Intentional/Unintentional models help – realising everyone has their struggles Read More »
Hello, Reaching out in the depths of winter, as can’t see the wood for the trees at the moment… my goal is to build a better relationship with food, it’s a big vice of mine and something I’ve always struggled with. Since the spring forward workshop I’ve been completely on it, been feeling really positive, …
My goal is to accept my body shape whatever it is. I love and accept many aspects of myself like my skills, brain, personality, humour etc., but I have always struggled with my body shape, sometimes more and sometimes less. During the pandemic I have gained weight and now feel quite low sometimes, overly concerned …
TW: weight loss Hello, I was part of the people who hadn’t managed to set a goal and after watching the model replay with Maisie – I think I have figured out why… I don’t have a cycle and have been told that if I lose a bit of weight (3 kilos) I might get …
I wanted to bring my Spring Forwards goal, my bricks and the intentional model I came up with to get coached on. I had stuff before that I wanted to bring to Ask A Coach, but I found it hard to do because of certain thoughts. Then I realized that that was exactly why I …
Hi there, I have a history of disordered eating in my teens and twenties but got over it eventually. 10 years ago I decided to no longer obsess over food, and that has worked for me. I now eat well and regularly, and I exercise moderately. (Yay!) However, I can’t seem to let go of this life-long and …