Hi there, I find it very difficult to trust my reasons for cancelling work when it shows up for me. I’m a Pilates Instructor and mum to a pre-schooler and sometimes situations come up where I need to cancel classes. A week or so ago I was going through a very tough time with my …
Trusting my own decisions when it comes to cancelling Read More »
Hi there, I’ve set a goal this spring to love myself unconditionally. I have been on a journey with this, and my self confidence has improved a great deal. However, I am still struggling with my weight. I really struggle with societal views of obese people and the constant blame culture. I actually feel pretty …
Hi coaches! I’ve been thinking a lot about my spring goal and it’s all a muddle for me. I’m creating results in lots of areas I’ve quit one job so I’ve more time and space for me/studying/my business. So I feel things are falling in to place and will even more so when I’ll work …
In my last ‘Evaluate & Activate’ review I wrote that I wanted to do more exercise. I thought maybe I’d do a YouTube dance workout or try taking a longer route to work to get more walking in. I put some times in my calendar and then just… didn’t do it. The thing is, I …
Hey coaches, I need some direction here 🙂 For the past month, my physical health has not been optimal, I keep catching viruses/bacteria and ending up sick every other week. I went to see my GP and she came to the conclusion that at the moment my immune system is quite weak which makes me …
Background: I am stressed and experiencing some of the same symptoms I experienced last year before I burned out. I am far more aware of the impact that this has on my body now after doing lots of work over the past year (thought work, therapy, acupuncture, developing boundaries around work) and so rather than …
Dear coaches, I have a short question about my BBT. I’m measering my tempature now for a while. And the last 2,5 months I’ve tempatures under the 36 celcius. To be exact 9 days from the 2.5 months was under the 36 celcius and the lowest was 35.45 celcius. Maisie is writing in her book …
Background: I am stressed and experiencing some of the same symptoms I experienced last year before I burned out. I am far more aware of the impact that this has on my body now after doing lots of work over the past year (thought work, therapy, acupuncture, developing boundaries around work) and so rather than …
I know that it is normal for human brains to have a negativity bias. And I think years’ of anxiety and depression in adolescence has made my bias quite strong without me recognising things can be any different – thinking of this in a neutral way without passing judgment on myself. I know that there …
C: I’ve been on sick leave from work for several months with consecutive viral illnesses/bacterial infections. I am not doing my usual activities because of symptoms and fatigue T: I am a burden to my husband F: worthless A: buffer with scrolling, talk about how much of a burden I feel to close friends, find …
I am pregnant for the first time, and really struggling with the first trimester pregnancy nausea. I don’t quite throw up every day, more often I just end up running to the bathroom and retching but then not actually vomiting. I talked to my healthcare provider about this, they didn’t seem concerned and told me …
I work in a primary school where the children can work individually, which involves much more spontaneity and individual support/help. Today school started again after the holidays. At noon when we’ve eaten all together I’ve got really emotional and asked, if it’s okey, that I take a bit of time for myself and have eaten …
Hi! I have a lot going on—toxic job I’m trying to leave, trying to conceive, and I was recently prescribed a very low dose of SSRIs because my coping strategies weren’t keeping up with my levels of anxiety. I want to give the medication a chance but the initial side effect is a huge increase …
I binge eat. depending on the severity I am in so much pain/feeling too nauseous/tired to do anything. I am currently in contact with specialist help, but I would also like to use thought work to help me address specific triggers as I think sometimes it can be a tool to become incapacitated to avoid …
Hi! I watched the nutrition for hormone health video earlier and somewhere the phrase “magical thinking” came up, and it really resonated with me, as something I’ve often used against myself in various ways. I would love some feedback on the model below, suggestions for developing helpful thoughts (really struggling with finding accessible ones), as …
Struggling with unkind/unhelpful magical thinking Read More »
I have been taking steps to become an intuitive eater as I want to not feel rubbish about how I look. It’s been going well and all in all I have felt okay. However I cannot help look at myself in photos and feel terrible about the way I look, ive cleansed my social media …
I struggle with my health and wellbeing for almost two years. Guessing that it might be burnout plus maybe ‘tiptoeing into perimenopause’ (43 yo). But as I did not get any diagnosis, I just tried to rest and started doubting my experiences (though it is getting worse). Now there is some ‘objective’ data that there …
Hi there, I need a little bit of help. I have been aware that I have an addiction to sugar for a long time. I have gone through phases of cutting sugar out following detoxes etc but it has always come back. I’m at a point now where I don’t think the food/drink itself is …
Hiya I’m 6 weeks into chemotherapy for breast cancer which was diagnosed in November and feeling like I’ve been hit by a steam train most days. Usually very active and optimistic about the day ahead or future plans, it’s taken me by surprise as I can usually dust myself off and dig deep to face …
Staring at the future like a rabbit in headlights Read More »
I’ve been living life in an activated or shut-down nervous system state the majority of the time for many, many years. It’s come to a head a few months ago when I burnt out and I’ve been on sick leave ever since. I’ve taken time to rest and also pursue things that fulfill me outside …
Motivating myself to do helpful/caring activities Read More »
Wow, well the coaching felt very eye-opening when you asked which part of me I am believing is real – the part with stage fright or the part that is delivering the class. It really got me thinking about what ‘real’ actually is. Objectively the more ‘real’ me is the one teaching. After all that’s …
My brother’s social media and algorithm has shifted his world view. (Andrew Tate has come up far too many times) He is on a drive to make millions as quick as he can, disregarding everything in his way… including family. He has also started expressing misogynistic views but refuses to see them that way. I …
“If I want something that I don’t need, I may have to sacrifice love and acceptance.” – Oh yes. That is accurate. Actually, no. That is an accurate transcription of the amorphous belief bumping around in my subconscious, but it is no longer accurate in the life that I have built for myself away from …
Part 2 of uprooting outdated beliefs about money Read More »
Hi..I have been qualified in my profession for a number of years. I have gained lots of experience and knowledge. I previously worked full time and mostly felt confident in my role and sought support from seniors if needed. I had my first baby and returned part time and had a new senior who was …
Hello, this is my first time asking for coaching. I know I need to get medical advice on my cycle (which has lots of spotting, long heavy periods, regular thrush and a massive increase in pain over the past 2 years since my cycle came back after my child was born) and my pelvic floor …
Getting medical advice on my cycle and pelvic floor Read More »
I think I’m trying to decide whether to look for a new job, but I’m open to the possibility that there’s another question buried in the murky middle. Background: I am an immigrant in Iceland and the job market is tough for non-Icelanders. A year ago, through a lucky connection, I got a very well-paying …
To quit or not to quit (is that really the question?) Read More »
I have a very vulnerable grandmother and I am her closest relative geographically. She is hard work and not your normal cuddly grandma – she has had Schizophrenia and nervous breakdowns through her life and it’s never been treated. My family have hidden her mental health as back then, it was a shameful problem. I …
Feeling guilt tripped by family + boundary setting Read More »
Hello! I am a new member to the Flow Collective. Firstly, I wanted to thank you for providing this wonderful, calm and creative space for me to explore. I have been moved in many ways during the last week and related to so many topics on the podcasts, workshops and replays. I was really torn …
I am wondering if I am ready for the Flow Collective. I have sadly had some of my old numbing emotions/activities (eating disorder, insomnia etc) pop up after striving to join in and engage with the content. The content is obviously fabulous and works amazingly for many people, I am just concerned I’m not quite …
Hello, I’m a new member and really excited to be here. This year has been one of major shifts for me. Earlier this year I went through some difficult friendship conflicts that led me to seriously reconsider my relationship with myself, I started therapy, and have been committed to building self-trust and resiliency as I …
A bit of info about me for context: I work part time as a librarian. I enjoy my job and it has saved me and built me up in many ways coming out of a period of ill health. It enables me now to be in a place where I have the space to aim …
Thank you for the helpful response which made me see a distinction between deciding I need to rest versus believing I deserve to rest. Here are a couple of models that I would appreciate feedback on: Unintentional model: C: I’ve decided I need short-term sick leave for restorative rest. T: I don’t really deserve it. …
I’m reflecting on my time at my family home over Christmas and would love some coaching on my response to my parents relationship. For context my mum has a chronic illness which badly effects her mobility and causes her a lot of pain which she takes a lot of very strong pain killers for. My …
Hello lovely coaches, Happy new year! Straight to the topic: I worked very hard from mid november until christmas. Through the years, I think I got my system used to stand relatively short high intensity stretches of work, and I suspect my body learnt how to not really give signs of tiredness (or maybe I …
I’ve been on sick leave for a few months due to burnout in my research job/PhD. I’ve been working 8 hrs per week on admin tasks for about 8 weeks now, which is going well. I will slowly build work back up with 2 extra work hours every 2 weeks (advice from company doctor), and …
Moving/Renovating & Returning to Work After Burnout Recovery Read More »
Thank you for such a helpful reply. Yes, anxiety is invited to Christmas this year, it would almost be unnatural if they weren’t, given the history, but they don’t get to sit at the head of the table. Here are some messy models. UM C: Christmas time T: Remembering past Christmas traumas and wondering what …
This is a very convoluted situation as I want to be the best in what I am doing, but I dont even think this is what I want to be doing. Well my brain has already said “maybe you should do something else. You know you can do something else.” To which I respond to …
When I have bad migraines for multiple days in a row I worry things are getting worse instead of better. I struggle to believe that I am healing when I feel so bad, although I can often believe I am healing when I feel well. It just doesn’t feel like a congruent thought – to …
I have been dealing with an issue for many years at work. I work in an open office environment with hundreds of people in an open space. Most days I can handle it ok, but there are times when I am very busy with my job and/or it is towards the end of my cycle …
For the past few years, I have been suffering from short (1-3 days) depressive episodes linked to my cycle (most months around day 10). This is the main reason I joined the flow collective – to try and figure our what is going on. I’ve been in the Flow Collective for almost a year. I …
How to accept my partner, unable to tolerate my low mood Read More »
This week at work has left me in a state of complete exhaustion and I am asking myself why. If I could describe it using the spoons analogy, I am in minus spoons right now. I could feel myself being close to running out of spoons early in the week, but things are so demanding …
I’d like some help stopping myself ruminating over a conversation with my mom, that brought up so many issues for me. I’ve been doing models and trying to find helpful thoughts so that I can move to peace & acceptance, but I’m finding it hard. The conversation was her asking me to lie to her …
Thanks for your answer; it’s very helpful to me. I realized that ‘rushing‘ is a huge topic for me; you’ve hit the nail on the hat! I’m able to do big things VERY quickly, and I spent most of my life ‘rushing‘ to reach goals. That was a massive part of my identity (or the …
Hi, I have this pattern of waking up and feeling low in energy, lethargic and often a sense of anxiety and this dissipates as the day goes on, and by the evening, often around 10pm, I suddenly feel like I have all the energy and could do all the creative things I’ve put off and …
My relationship to movement has improved a lot, I now exercise in ways that I enjoy, to make myself feel good and care for my health. This year I have been trying to sustainably build up the amount of aerobic exercise I do to meet the weekly guidelines but I have had some setbacks with …
I am in the 2nd Trimester of my first pregnancy and I have a chronic illness, the most debilitating symptoms being migraine. The first trimester everything flared up. Now I am in the 2nd Trimester and my symptoms are in remission. Which sounds great on paper, but I have a lot of thoughts and feelings …
Hello coaches I’m finding it very emotional to deal with the fact that I have osteoporosis as a result of a severe eating disorder. I’ve been in recovery for about six years now and had several bone scans over the last nearly 10 years. Although my bone density has improved it’s still in the osteoporosis …
I’ve worked myself into the ground (at home and work) and I’ve even had counselling for it following a serious illness which was probably brought in my over work earlier this year. Yet I still do it! How do I break this pattern? Answer: The first thing to do when you’ve identified something …
Hi – for a long time I’ve found other people’s comments about diet culture very activating to my (in recovery) eating disorder neural pathways. I know lots of useful thoughts to use in these situations such as ‘most people know very little about nutrition’; ‘this doesn’t apply to me’; ‘I know what I need’ etc. …
I’m BIPOC have worked for many years at a prestigious company that has a race problem around progression, and I have direct experience of this in my career there. It’s taken a lot of work to feel safe and centred enough to decide to leave the company which I now have and seriously start looking …
The Delightful Cocktail of Bitterness, Anger and Insecurity at Work Read More »
Hello, I am in my final year of my PhD. After 6 years, I am one 50-page paper away from graduating! However, the last 2-3 months have been hell, for many reasons, and my physical health has been on the rocks. I have recently recovered from surgery, and although I’m physically doing much better, my …
Dear coaches, I come from a place where I was fawning a lot within my jobs. To me, it’s a very toxic environment. So I decided to quit and handed in the notice a couple of weeks ago. My last day at work will be in the middle of February. Because of being activated and …
Hey 🙂 I’d like help creating a model for my thoughts/beliefs about my body/health, and this (un-true) idea that I have about myself as someone who subconsciously self-sabotages and therefore feeds into this idea of self-fulfilling prophecies — ie. I worry that something is inherently wrong with my body and that I have some underlying …
I have been called back for more in-depth heart tests after a 7 day heart trace showed abnormalities in my trace results. It has re-awoken a deep fear that covid caused my heart some damage. This has been a fear I have had since I experienced some scary episodes and symptoms when I was first …
Overcoming mistrust of conventional medical route after previous bad experience Read More »
Hi, I’m feeling particularly tired right now and am working through a GP diagnosis of subclinical hypothyroidism. I don’t want it to get me down so would like to try this model- C I have s/clin hypothyroidism T Whilst I work through my treatment options I can still enjoy life with the energy I have. …
Hi, I’m having a tough time with my health at the moment, it is looking likely I have an autoimmune condition, on top of recently being diagnosed with EDS and being referred for assessment for ADHD. I’m struggling daily with the symptoms and with fear around what the future will hold. I’ve been doing a …
My husband had a mental breakdown two years ago and I was left to care for our 18 month old solo while he was recovering (he was still at home with us but couldn’t really get out of bed much and I was very very lonely during this time). Since then, through therapy and medication, …
Supporting my partner in illness when I’m burnt out Read More »
Hello – I’m frustrated at my continuing inability to feel acceptance and compassion towards myself when I pick up a sports injury. I have a history of anorexia and have had problems with overexercise in the past. I’m still quite dependent on it and my relationship with exercise is definitely a work in progress. Often …
Hello lovely coaches, Things have been rough and the thoughts going through my brain keep going back to “I can’t cope, I can’t take much more, I’m so alone, what else is going to be thrown at me” etc. In the last ten days of august: I hurt myself badly falling down the stairs, I …
Hi, I know you can’t give out medical advice, so I am asking for pointers in the right direction to get help. I am 31, I have very heavy periods and short cycles (22-24 days) and my cycle experience is contradictory to how it is often describes for other people that bleed. I have been …
short cycles, heavy periods, feeling low in spring Read More »
Following the recent unexpected and premature delivery of my baby, I have developed high blood pressure, was put on medication for this and monitored in hospital a a result. Following my discharge I am required to monitor my blood pressure daily at home. I am under lots of daily pressure as my baby is on …
I am hoping to get some help with some difficulties I am having. I feel that I am finding my mid 40s a difficult time. I have always enjoyed being active – mainly running and had ankle surgery 1 year ago which has stopped me being able to run like I used to. I’m still …
Hi TFC coaches, I am currently in the throes of losing my Mum to terminal cancer. She and I are very close, and I have been her primary carer since my Dad passed away 6 years ago. I used to be someone who drank a little too much and was addicted to cigarettes, and I …
Hi there For the past 2 years I have had brown blood 2 or 3 days before my period (only spotting), and from about day 1-3 of my period. By day 3 it starts to have a red tinge to it but it’s still very dark. My period is also very light until about day …
I really enjoyed the reset replay and the Autumn workshop and am wanting support with the following which is something I find so tricky.. In the past 2 years I have followed a ‘diet’ that took 8 months to get me to lose 4 stone of excess weight and get to a healthier place. Since …
I have such a hard time enjoying naps. I usually need them as part of a hard day protocol but I expect too much from it? It’s as if it doesn’t warrant merit unless I feel very energetic afterward. C: I wake up from a nap T: I don’t feel different/still tired F: Disappointed A: …
Hi there, since Lockdown I have been experiencing suicidal thoughts. My dad was hospitalised at the beginning of this year & recieved an alzeimers diagnosis & moved into a care home. This all felt like a big shock for me & being 27 I don’t know anyone with this shared experience & have felt extremely …
Hi lovely coaches! As I was completing the End of Season review worksheet, I noticed a challenging pattern in my life as of late. Since I joined TFC, I’ve experienced some incredible expansion, growth and success which has translated into a new self-concept. This shift has also brought a lot of work opportunities and a …
Feeling resentful when loved ones want some of my time Read More »
Hello I’m feeling like there is so much that I need direction and help with I don’t know where to begin. I suppose I’ve spent all my life struggling with what now I see as effects of Pms or PmDD. Im generally a highly sensitive person anyway and my mood definitely get affected Id probably …
I have always had very heavy periods that wipe me out for a few days. I am currently taking mefenamic acid (prescribed by the doc) as this is the only way I can function on the first day or two of my period. I have been looking back at the inflammation and oestrogen videos and …
Getting panicked that my period will always be horribly painful Read More »
Hello coaches, Here we go… I feel very stuck, in that I have constrained my desire to have a healthy relationship with my cycle by implementing the use of hormonal birth control methods that I truly do not want. I would like to give some background info on my history with these contraceptives and what …
I miss my period, but I do not want to endure another pregnancy Read More »
Hello, I am four weeks post termination. I have had lots of support around me and I have been able to look after myself lots. I was sure of my decision but had quite a tough time physically and have been a little drained and low on energy. As such, I am taking magnesium, B …
Hi, I know first submission was a long time ago, but I feel like ‘life has been living me’ in this very turbulent summer. For a while I have been able to make choices that benefited me and not give in to my desire of the moment and I felt like I had become better, …
Hi there I’ve wanted to ask a coach for some time but delayed doing so for a number of reasons but here I am. I watched Maisie’s call this morning on ‘Safety’ and I recognised that I am currently in ‘collapse’ mode and I often visit this place after a long period of work. I …
Self trust and attaching my self worth to my productivity Read More »
My mother-in-law is having some major health issues, some of which can be controlled with lifestyle changes. I have made many changes to my diet and lifestyle over the past few years and living healthy is a big part of who I am and what I enjoy learning about. I love my mother-in-law and it’s …
Thank you so much for your helpful coaching, It has really cleaned it up for me. Here are my models on this 2 un intentionals and 2 intentionals, would love your thoughts. C: I practice yoga once or twice a fortnight. T: Its not enough. A: Procrasinate, I withdraw from the practice, I compare myself …
Being ok with not practicing my usual yoga practice part 2 Read More »
Hello , so I have practiced yoga for 16 years and it has always been at the forefront of my wellbeing. It saved my life. I began to practice a method called Ashtanga and spiritually and emotionally I grew beyond what i thought possible. I then got qualified to teach Yoga and decided that this …
Being ok with not practicing my usual yoga practice. Read More »
Thank you for you reply. What I think it should be. Self-acceptance should be me being happy with my lived experience. It should be me not having thoughts all the time about how I should change things, having positive thoughts instead. Feeling calm when the pain comes up. Remaining strong in the belief that the …
My summer goal is to get to know and accept myself. My rocks are to celebrate myself daily (not just success or progress), spend time connecting with my emotions and sensations in my body and to self-coach, particularly on ‘need to fix me’ thoughts. When my pain and fatigue levels are tolerable, I’m having some …
Hi, I would love some advice on talking about bodies and beauty to my children. Over the last 6 months I have done a lot of work on myself in terms of accepting my body shape. I am probably in the best frame of mind I have ever been about my body (but still working …
Hi coaches, I am experiencing some negative feelings in the past few days and I’ve done some thought work and tried to put them in a model. Since the beginning of this week, I am at home, with Covid and I am feeling pretty bad, I was not lucky to get the mild symptoms. I’ve …
I have fibromyalgia and ADHD. I have been managing my fibromyalgia for 5 years and was only diagnosed with ADHD in January 2022 and consequentially started medication. It helped my fibromyalgia exponentially as it didn’t take so much energy to concentrate and my fatigue became minimal. Last year, I believed I could never work a …
Recently I have been noticing I have been feeling inadequate and I know this is putting me into a freeze response of moving forward. I found myself in compare and despair when I am feeling inadequate. I am not working in a traditional sense because I have a chronic health condition. I feel inadequate for …
Returning to work after poor mental health Thanks for all the ❤️ on my post yesterday folks. It really helped me be accountable to look after myself writing it down knowing that it would be seen by you. I’m noticing that my reflex thoughts aren’t actually the same as my rational thoughts about returning ti …
Returning to work / “I’m not good enough” / perfectionism Read More »
I’m in the early stages of pregnancy and it’s had a big impact on my mental health. Honeslty, it was something I thought was off the cards for me after years of long term illness. Even though it was something I wanted. After getting pregnant I have experienced a host of symptoms. Migraines being the …
I experience migraine. At one point they were back to back for months at a time. Now they happen maybe 4 times a month. Reducing them remains a goal of mine. But right now i’m in the middle, they have improved but I still experience very debilitating symptoms, there is a shift in my hormones …
Heyhey! First time here, getting it out into the open. I think I better just start somewhere, to provide some background information to my question(s). The last 2 months have been challenging. I’ve resigned from a job that was not a fruitful place to be. Actually, it was a place where it seems people are …
Hiya! I just wanted to follow up on this. Sorry it’s tell me a while. Firstly to say, thanks so much for your well wishes, I am feeling much better now. Still in recovery and wobbly and slow, but in less immediate discomfort, and the catheter is out, thank God! Your answer was so helpful. …
Hey, I came back for more:) Thank you for the help with my model, I thought about it and adjusted the Unintentional and Intentional models. I added the new sentences in between ** Unintentional C: Playing badminton in a team. T: I am bad at sports. F: Shame. A: I make excuses not to go …
Hello, I’m looking for some help with a model please, thanks I started with my action line… A: i eat lots of junk food F before I eat lots of junk food: overwhelmed, things getting too much so I’ve shut down, tired, zoned out, head hurts. R after eating junk food: I feel lethargic, tummy …
Feeling a bit all over the place – constantly tired, anxious, seem to spend my days sorting the kids out/looking after puppy/doing washings/making meals- but so bored of it all, feel sick, cook healthy meals but eat loads of junk food too, very distant from husband and probably kids too, brain fog, headaches, muscles always …
Thoughts download: Im not reliable throughout my entire menstrual cycle. I can become sick again. Health insurance is too expensive. I dont want to loose my free health insurance. I either need to be poor with free health insurance or very rich, but not in the middle, if not i will have to work too …
Hello there, I am struggling with some negative thoughts and emotions after my sports training today. I came straight home and went to the thought models to try to understand what is going on but I might need your help. I will give a bit of background to this situation and then try to apply …
Shame and lack of confidence (when playing sports) Read More »
Hi – I don’t think I have the energy for a model, but maybe you can help me get to one? I’m feeling pretty crap after having a hysterectomy on Friday – obviously my tummy is very tender, and very low energy, which makes it hard to find any positivity to get through this. I’ve …
In December I was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer. Even though it has been labeled ‘easy’ by many, there are parts of the process that have not been easy. I present as a very healthy person and most of the time I feel that way too. However, I live every day because I take medication, I …
Hello, How are you, After the summer workshop, I have come up with a result I would like to create. (I am on the path of healing from an eating disorder, and have made the decision to stop counting calories, and portions – and the most important thing is to let go of the idea …
Hello! My summer goal is to better manage my energy levels and I would like feedback on the goal and my rocks. I’ve chosen this goal because I find myself feeling absolutely drained quite often, which is unpleasant and unkind to myself. I’ve considered this goal previously, but it used to be a very “dirty” …
Hello! I am reaching out for some new perspectives on how to approach a sticky pattern around food timing that is meaning I persistently put my body into hypoglycaemia. I am recovering from anorexia, and while this year, I have really transformed and found a lot of freedom from that – to an extent I …
Approaching food timing – blood sugar and staying safe Read More »
Hey coaches, i have a few complex questions and would appreciate some initial input: I don’t know if I can or want to continue in my job. I’ve been struggling with it for years (I’m a stage designer at the theater) and just can’t get ahead. For the past 5 years I have had episodes …