Aggressive communication

Hi I am trying to work on an intentional model relating to me trying to use more kinder language. I’ve modelled my IM and IM and they feel pretty good. How can I start working towards the IM – would bridging thoughts help?

Ive really thought on my thought line- it started with people not listening, people not thinking properly about consequences, I think I know best might actually be what I’m thinking but it feels uncomfortable.

C- Dan said my communication can be aggressive
T- I know best
F- frustrated
S- hot, flushed,
A- speaking more loudly
A-interrupting
A- not listening properly
A- gesticulating
A- lack of eye contact
A- unapproachable body language
A- looking at phone when someone talking
R- annoyed that people ignore me

C-communication with people
T- I am a good communicator
F- confident
S- warm, relaxed,
A- spending more time with people
A-not wasting time thinking about my communication
A-not spending time thinking and judging people
A- bit talking about peoples behaviour to my partner which annoys both of us
R- better relationships with people

 

Answer:

 

These models look pretty good, and there’s some room for tweaking. The C lines are different – so I wonder if you want to step into an intentional model that is about Dan saying that your communication can be aggressive AND create an intentional model about your communication style. What do you think? Secondly, I’ll offer a different R line for your UM: I don’t give other people a chance to be just as right as I think I am. Notice how that lands.

It seems like your IM is a goal. Is that fair to say? If so, let’s talk about how to break this down into a goal you can work towards. For starters, what is a good communicator like in your opinion? How do they react, respond, and reach out? What do they do in a tough conversation? How do they think about communicating? What makes them good at communicating?