Approaching food timing – blood sugar and staying safe

Hello! I am reaching out for some new perspectives on how to approach a sticky pattern around food timing that is meaning I persistently put my body into hypoglycaemia.

I am recovering from anorexia, and while this year, I have really transformed and found a lot of freedom from that – to an extent I hardly knew possible – one relic is food timing, particularly around lunch. I typically work at my office for the morning, and return to work around 230/3pm to work from home for the rest of the afternoon, and eat lunch then – or later, if I have meetings.

Although I do eat some nuts/seeds around 1130, it means I am frequently pushing my body into hypoglycaemia, which doesn’t support my hormones, or my emotions, particularly in autumn.

I am also trying to conceive (via IVF as I am doing it solo) – and recently came off a disappointing cycle where I only got two eggs from four follicles, and no embryos from a stimulated cycle, so it is especially important that I support my body as best as I can.

But – it sounds like ‘why on earth don’t you just eat earlier’, but it is sticky as it is bound up in a lot of what my brain perceives as ‘safe context’ in which to eat – i.e. being back at home, where I can relax, and late enough that I know I ‘deserve to eat’ (a lot of my anorexia was about pushing through hunger as opposed to explicitly being about weight).

So, I get stuck in a pattern like this:

C: I am eating lunch at 3:30/4 pm (I know this is general circumstance)
T: I am stuck between keeping myself safe and being able to eat enough, without expending emotional resources I don’t have, and supporting my body and hormones in the way I know I need to.
F: Helpless, self-critical and stuck
A: I keep eating at the same time.

Or on a given day:

C: It is 1:30 pm
T: I told myself I would eat earlier today but it is too hard, I’m not hungry yet and I just don’t want to expend all my resources on this today.
F: Defeated
A: I push lunch later
R: I do eat well but push my body into hypoglycamia

Believe me I have tried to shift this myself, including through thoughts (i.e. replacing T with ‘I can do this, I know now that I can keep myself safe and nourish myself. I choose to support my body) – but it is sticky, particularly because of the bind I feel I am in between managing my blood sugar and expending a lot of emotional resources/risking re-triggering my eating disorder reactions to lunch, which I’m still nervous of – they are rooted in trauma so the limbic system can be a bit full on no matter what you are thinking).

Any new ways to think about or approach this would be very gratefully received! (including if perhaps it is ok to be gentle with myself on food timing right now)

 

Answer:

Good work on putting this into models, I’ll just suggest a few things you can notice. In your first model, your result is you continue to prove yourself right. It might be interesting to question your thoughts that you don’t have the emotional resources and that it takes emotional resources to eat at a certain time.

In your second model, take some time and fill out the A line. What do you do? what do you not do when you are feeling defeated? You result will be more about what’s happening mentally and emotionally than physically with food. And it will be similar to your first model because again you are telling yourself you don’t have the resources and then actually expending them in this back and forth cycle.

Notice how you already have your answer, but sometimes we want permission to believe it. Yes, it is ok to be gentle on yourself with food timing.  The time on the clock when you eat is a data point in your day. Where it becomes a problem is when you are making the time mean something and that sets off a pattern of thoughts that keep you stuck.

What would be different if you trusted yourself? Try doing a thought download and answer that question and bring what comes up back the ask a coach.