Celebrating first book rejection – and trusting next steps

Hi,
I recently wrote about finishing my book proposal, which I’ve been working on since April. I submitted it to an agent contact of mine that I was very keen to work with, for various reasons. And she replied a few weeks later with a rejection.
It was however, a pretty positive one: she said that she had ummed and ahhed a lot, and that it was a ‘great idea’, a ‘strong proposal’ and that I’m a good writer and shouldn’t be disheartened.
Then she explained why it was a no – that from conversations she’s had in the publishing industry she knows it isn’t as progressive yet (my idea is about bisexuality), and that my online platform isn’t big enough so it feels like too much of a risk to be able to sell it. Also that it’s a clash with her other queer female clients.
My initial response was shock I think. I’d met her previously at an event and had been very hopeful about this one! Then there were feelings around being a ‘failure’ given that my online platform isn’t as big as it needs to be, even though that’s something I already knew would be the next step. And then comparing myself to her other clients who are content creators as well as authors!! Plus a disappointment because I’d have genuinely loved to work on her with this (she’s bi).
There were so many great takeaways from her feedback: namely that the project that I’ve intentionally focussed my energy on is itself great and on the right track. With a clear path of where I need to go next – building that online platform via instagram and substack. And more info on the publishing context and her own client list which are nothing to do with me.
I also know that rejection is part of the book submission process and it’s very normal and doesn’t mean that it shoudn’t be written!
So, I would like to feel confidence-boosted by her positive feedback, and motivated to go for it with my online platform building as a result. And continue to take action to submit it to more agents (I’ve submitted to another 2 where I had good contacts who haven’t replied yet).
However, somehting else that came up was some relief around NOT getting the agent / deal… right now, that is. I’m exhausted from the process of working on the proposal itself. And I think I would benefit from some time to start the platform building, and also to work on my freelancing (which I launched at the start of this year but haven’t been able to give as much attention to as I’d have liked because of the book).
My instinct is to pause the book submissions for even a month or so, and after xmas to get started building my insta and re-launching a substack that i used to write about the topic of my book. And to have some time to send freelance pitches and get into a rhythm there (esp because money is a priorirty for me atm). Then to continue pitching to agents in spring.
But I want to make sure that this isn’t me ‘giving up’ or a rejection response.
Do you have any tips on untangling that?
And also – I do want to celebrate getting my first rejection! Because it means i’m putting myself out there and that idea is out in the world… It’s a sign that I’m on the right track. And it hasn’t shaken my faith in the book itself, just made me realise that the timing is that maybe I’d benefit from being able to catch my breath in some other career areas (before actually writing the damn thing!)
Any thoughts much appreciated.
Thank you!

 

 

Answer:

Hooray for your first rejection! That is an amazing win.

You get to decide what you do with your time and energy. You are totally allowed to take a moment to regroup after a rejection. You are even allowed to give up. If you felt completely confident in your decision, what story would you choose to tell about your current plan?