courageous action model part2

“What feelings come up when you see these words? What energy do they bring?”
fear, disappointment, overwhelm
“Make micro goals along the way and show yourself that you can keep your commitments.
What’s the first step and when do you want to complete it?”
preliminary research what the new topic could look like and how it compares – completion: end of day
I know my next steps but the fear and nervous system overwhelm feels so overpowering I struggle to focus when I try to do them and spend 90% of the time calming myself down or just avoid the work completely, that’s why I thought the model might help

c looking for a topic for my BT
t let’s find sth interesting
f curiosity
…..
r find a topic for my BT
If I just use the first step I am in an intentional model, it’s only when I look at the whole essentially what my old c line was that I get overwhelmed. So do I just try to always stick to the here and now? what do I do when I can’t hold the negative wave of the rest off?
testing other c lines:
c preparing to write my BT
already brings up stress and fear
c writing my BT
t I am not sure I am able to do this work in the time I have
thought error I have already talked to my advisor that we will only officially start the timer when I have finished all the prep work so the only time problem is me having a timeline in mind in which I want to get it done creating unnecessary pressure by comparing myself to healthy people
t I don’t want to do all this work again
f disappointment, shame, hopeless, sad
s pressure behind eyes, chest and stomach but different from the overwhelming nervous system activation
a avoid work, tell myself it’s too hard, feel bad about not working, focus on the failure of the first attempt
r not doing the work while feeling horrible about it
but when I let myself off the hook and say then don’t do it or leave it for later I feel resistance as well. The thing is I want to have my thesis and by extension my BS done. I just don’t want to do all this work again on a topic I am no longer that interested in. Not having it done also keeps me from fully considering what I want to do next/after bc I have this big unfinished thing in the back of my mind that I have already invested so much time in but am missing the energy and motivation to get through the final push. I had something similar before graduating high school. The difference there was that I knew what I wanted to do after as well as wanting to graduate with my friends and not be left behind, so I pushed through finals with minimal studying and just got it done. While I can cut corners and just not aim for a high grade with this as well, I am missing the other motivators. How do I bring those two parts of me together so I can just get the work done with imperfect action instead of wasting all this energy on infighting in my head?

 

 

Answer:

 

As Mars always says, “The way you eat an elephant is one bite at a time.” When your brain gets overwhelmed, how do you treat yourself? Now think of someone else in the same situation as you. How would you treat them if they came to you with the same overwhelm of not knowing where to start or feeling unmotivated, or stuck, or overwhelmed?

Finally, you mentioned wanting to get this work done. What would it mean for you if you got your BS? Why is it important to you?