Decision making- Accepting an opportunity

At my work there is an area which needs more resource and my boss has suggested I would be the best one to do it. It would be an extension of what I have already been doing for 4 years so in many ways it is what I have been working towards. However I am already at full capacity and taking this on would lead to me filling essentially four job roles which feels impossible. So I would need to hand over some element of what I do now in order to free up bandwidth, which makes me feel uncomfortable because I enjoy and am good at what I do. I also fear that it is a role where the expectation would bleed into my non-paid time, which I am not willing to do as I have many of my own creative projects that I want to grow and have clear boundaries about leaving work at work in order to prioritise my own projects when I’m not at work. Really I have been dreaming of going down to 3 or 4 days at work in order to take my own projects more seriously. Which is making me feel confused about going for this opportunity because it means taking on more responsibility, not less! However it could mean more money and more experience, both of which are things that I want. What I really want is both- I want to have the time to spend creating success and money from my own projects, AS WELL as taking this step forward up in my current paid role- which I don’t know ‘how’ I will do but I accept that I don’t need to know the how at this point. So through self coaching I have decided that I want to go for the opportunity, by choosing the thought that it could in fact be fun and easy and that it could in fact enrich my personal projects.

Although I have decided I would like coaching on these two unintentional models that are causing me to doubt my decision:

C: Decided to go for opportunity at work
T: I can’t have it all
F: Conflicted
A: Try to imagine ‘how’ I will take this on at work but also continue to work towards my personal goals
A: Doubt whether I can do both
R: Create drama around wanting both things

C: Decided to go for opportunity at work
T: I’m not the best person to do it
F: Unworthy
A: Imagine situations where I will be challenged and uncomfortable
A: Come up with reasons why I wouldn’t be able to do it as well as somebody else
R: Create urge to keep myself small and not go for it after all

 

 

Answer:

What stands out to me is the action line in your second model. “A: Imagine situations where I will be challenged and uncomfortable.” That’s where growth comes from. It would be easy to stay with Plan A, but you’ve chosen Plan B. Your reasons not to take the job are very fear based because of the unknowns. You can love your brain for offering all the scary things that could happen, and not listen to it. The reasons you’ve identified for Plan B are the pay increase and experience.  I would offer that you add being challenged and uncomfortable to your list of reasons to take the job. Instead of being afraid, you’ll open up to the unknowns because you know you are just the person for this job. Your boss thinks so, now you just need to think so. The way your build self confidence is to face challenges and prove to yourself that you can overcome them.  How is this job going to help you gain the self confidence you need to truly design the life you want? Give your brain the task of finding evidence that you are right where you’re supposed to be, for now. Remember you are an adult and you always have choices.  Give yourself the gift of sticking with your choice and going all in for a year. Then reevalute if you want to.