Hi,
I made good progress in the first half of April with my spring goal of decluttering. Today, as I reflect back I find myself at an impasse. I find it hard to get rid of my books. Overall I feel a lot of confusion as my books really look like a random selection of versions of my self I once wanted to be or become, but I never actually got to really dive into them … many of these books reflect phases of dissociation, instant gratification, there is no red line …
The result I wish for:
A bookcase that holds the books I have read and cherish, books I absolutely know I want to and will read, books that remind me of my educational pathway and that serve me as reference books.
What holds me back are the following thoughts and feelings:
C: de-cluttering books
T: I have too many books
F: overwhelm
C: de-cluttering books
T: I wasted so much money on these books
F: guilt
C: de-cluttering books
T: I will never be able to read all of these books
F: overwhelm and guilt
I think the second UM is the one I want to work with, as the money aspect is the one that blocks me from proceeding. but I am really clueless how to arrive there. doing a model feels a little constructed. any tips how to proceed?
C: de-cluttering books
T:
F: motivation
S:
A:
R: A bookcase that holds the books I have read and cherish, books I absolutely know I want to and will read, books that remind me of my educational pathway and that serve me as reference books.
Answer:
Well, let’s dive into the second UM then! Notice what your brain is doing here. I’m guessing that the factual part of this narrative is that you used money to buy these books. The story your brain is giving you is that you wasted the money. I wonder what is beneath that thought. Why does your brain categorize this as wasteful? What does being wasteful with money mean in your mind? Observe your responses with compassion and as though you’re seeing this for the first time. You’re giving yourself space to explore and look for some new ideas about why parting with these books feels hard. No need to take action yet, you’re just getting to know yourself a little better.