Early pregnancy

I found out I was pregnant last week after eight months of trying to conceive. This is my first ever pregnancy and I’m four weeks & four days along. I feel absolutely overjoyed and celebratory. I’m also struggling a lot with the unknown of whether the pregnancy will be viable, how long it will last, and how long it could take to wait until the 12 week scan and being in the unknown until then. I haven’t told many people about it yet, because I don’t want a long list of people to tell if I end up losing the pregnancy. I have a two week (mostly solo) trip coming up next week and I’m feeling nervous about all the possible scenarios – what if I miscarry while I’m away? what if I become extremely sick or nauseous? I would love to receive coaching on all of this – especially on being in the unknown.

 

 

Answer:

A gentle congratulations to you! It makes total sense that your brain is going into overdrive. Why do you think it’s so concerned with the future? Why do you think it wants to focus on the unknowns?  How can you support yourself in this moment when you are overjoyed and nervous?

It can be helpful to write out the answers to the “what-ifs”. Follow them all the way to whatever catastrophe your brain thinks will happen.  Write down ten what-ifs that sound more fun (and are just as possible to happen)

Ground yourself in the present. What do you know NOW? What is true NOW? A thought that can be really useful is T: if X happens, I’ll deal with it then.  If you were able to be present, how could this trip be an opportunity to celebrate with your little secret friend?

A wise coach I know uses this thought: Plan to the level that quiets your mind.  How can you support yourself by planning for whatever happens on the trip so that your mind can focus on what you want it to during the trip. Allow some nervousness to come along. It’s not a problem.  We’re here to support you. Bring back any questions , insights or models that you come up with.