fear of the unkown

Hi coaches,

I notice that I have a strong fear of the unknown. This shows up in the big things as well as in the small, like daily situations (trying new food or activities) where I shy away from trying anything new, even when the familiarity sometimes seems a bit boring to me and my behavior patterns keep me stuck.

This is true especially when I’m on my own. When I’m with someone else I tend to be a bit more open to changing things up.

I have already done a thought download on this and the main thoughts behind this are that I couldn’t handle it (the change) and just overall couldn’t handle if anything went wrong.

Another big one is that I don’t know how to do things and that change is scary and I don’t know what to expect.

There seems to be an overall lack of trust, that things will go ok and that I will be fine at the other end of change. Lots of black and white thinking as well.

Any advice on how to go on from here and to be more trusting?

Thanks!

 

 

Answer:

 

First of all, our brains are programmed to avoid things that potentially will harm us, and change is certainly one of those things – we love certainty and predictability. But the stakes were much higher 10,000 years ago when we were using this part of our brains for literal survival. Now, the stakes are much lower in most cases, but our brains sometimes don’t register it.

But I would like to invite you to get curious with yourself. When you say you couldn’t handle it if anything went wrong, is that 100% true? Why or why not? Notice whether you can untangle the story from the facts in your brain. Bring what comes up for you back to us.