Feeling like I am in the wrong body

I feel terrible when I see pictures of myself

C: seeing pictures of myself
T: You look gross
E; shame
A: trying to find out if I really look like that, spiraling, feeling embarrassed, checking to see if people like me, questioning my worth, overeating,
R: I talk badly to myself

I´ve gained some weight in the last few years and I am struggling to recognize myself in pictures. I get surprised when I see myself and even grossed out. It is clearly not good for me and something that effects me greatly. It affects my belief in myself, my eating habits and my belief in the future (in perhaps finding a partner or be taken seriously)

When I am dressed up or wearing something that I like I can walk into a room and feel really beautiful. And I have always really liked that reaction you get from people when you have made an effort. Now I often feel silly, when I look back in pictures and see that the dress didn’t fit as good as I thought and that my belly was showing. I get a strong sense of shame.

I really want to come home to myself, and also stop the overeating and focus on food (I am really scared that It will lead to bigger issues). I want to look at myself with pride and not feel like a whale. I want to feel desired and look stunning always.

How do I do this?

Answer:

Thank you for your vulnerability in this post. I love the thought, “I want to come home to myself.” If you put this in the T line of the model you created above, how would the rest of the model look? In what ways, if any, does this create a possibility to think about changing how you view yourself from a place of compassion and love as opposed to shame? Come back to us with what you discover with either a realization or where you feel resistance in a post titled, “In the wrong body pt. 2”