Food goals in autumn/winter

Hello, Reaching out in the depths of winter, as can’t see the wood for the trees at the moment… my goal is to build a better relationship with food, it’s a big vice of mine and something I’ve always struggled with. Since the spring forward workshop I’ve been completely on it, been feeling really positive, making lots of changes and things have been really working…until Autumn hit! It knocked me off track, and now can’t seem to get back on track. I’ve noticed it’s the way I talk to myself which is the thing that makes me eat things I shouldn’t, it’s my go to comfort blanket. The more negative I am to myself, the more I eat. Now with my goal re food, I’m finding myself in a spiral of feeling sad -> eat -> feel guilty for eating -> eat more, and so the cycle goes on… Any advice on how I can break the cycle of beating myself up?

 

Answer:

What a wonderful question to bring to AAC.

Something I notice in your post is that you think that you were completely on it until Autumn came, and now you think that you’re off track. You’re either on or you’re off…there’s no in between. Can you see the black-and-white nature of this way of thinking? I wonder if there’s a chance that you noticing this, and bringing your awareness to AAC to ask for some coaching is actually a sign that you’re working towards your goal just as you are meant to be?

In a recent coaching call, Mars spoke about watching a baby learn to walk. To paraphrase her, she said that when they fall we don’t shame or criticize them, we say, “Good job! You’re doing so well! Come on, try again.” And eventually, most babies become full-blown walking steam trains.’ Can you extend yourself this kind of compassion and encouragement? If so, what would that sound and feel like? If not, why not?

Although you’ve experienced what feels like a set-back, it does not mean that you have been set back. What it does indicate is that there is room to build a protocol for next cycle’s autumn; this is an excellent time to do some reflection. Consider these questions as they pertain to your goal:

• What went well in your last cycle?

• What didn’t go well?

• What will you do differently next cycle?

• What have you learned from having this experience in your autumn?

• Can you pinpoint any circumstances that sparked the negative self talk? 

• What emotions are asking to be processed and expressed?

• Knowing these things, what can you do to prepare yourself for future triggers?

Lastly, I highly recommend watching Maisie’s coaching call on Perfectionism from May 3 as well! Come back with some of your insights and for more coaching when you’re ready!