Friendship with ex partner 3

Hi coaches,

I had a really strong reaction to your last answer and tried to sort it out in the following model:

C: coach wrote “ground yourself in your values”
T: I can’t
F: overwhelm
S: high alert, tense, ready to fight or take flight
A: cry, distance myself from everyone, move around on autopilot
R: I can’t trust myself

I tried answering your questions and figuring out my values but there is so much resistance and I was not able to move out of the model above. It makes me want to crawl under my blanket and hide there forever. I’m not sure how such a harmless sentence can throw me off balance like this.

 

 

Answer:

In this moment, nothing is going wrong. How can you exquisitely care for yourself right now? What support do you need or want? Who can you reach out to that you know will have your back or be a good distraction? Co-regulation can be your friend here. It’s ok to be overwhelmed. It’s ok that coaching sometimes strikes a nerve.  This is great information AND you don’t have to do anything with it now.

Crawl under the blanket as long as you need.

Your brain is telling you it will last forever. It won’t.

We’re here when things feel a bit more manageable.