Frustration / Impatience regarding my cycle health while TTC

Hi there, I would really appreciate some input and coaching… My boyfriend and I are trying to conceive for almost a year now, I feel like I’m getting impatient and frustrated in the process and it’s affecting too much of my life. I have PCOS with long & irregular cycles, therefore ovulation is rare and unpredictable to as when it’s going to happen. I track my cycle and really get into the data, but lately it feels like it’s just an accumulation of information which I can’t make any sense of. I get really anxious missing out on my ovulation date, and by now it almost feels like one of my work projects I want to get “right”, otherwise I’m failing. I’m trying for a while now to ease up, but can’t seem to do that. It really affects my mood and takes up too much space in my mind. I’m at a point where I see that I need to make a change, so I’m trying to self-coach… those are my models at the moment:

Unintentional: C: I have an irregular cycle and it takes us more time to conceive. / T: After everything I tried for the last two years regarding my cycle health, nothing’s changing. / F: Frustrated. Anxious. Tense. Disappointed with my body. / A: Being moody and obsess over cycle data. / R: Having an unloving relationship with my body. Getting pregnant eventually.

Intentional: C: I have an irregular cycle and it takes us more time to conceive. / T: It will happen for us in due time. / F: Relaxed. Curious. Compassionate towards my body./ A: Stop obsessive cycle tracking. Enjoy time with just the two of us together. Having more mental capacity for other things in my life. / R: Having a loving relationship with my body. Getting pregnant eventually.

How could I get from UM to IM? Feels like a huge stretch at the moment… Many thanks for any input on this!

 

 

Answer:

You never have to pick a thought that doesn’t resonate with you. This one is probably too vague and feels so out of your control. It just feeds into your impatience when you’re simply waiting for “it” to happen. Redefine success. This is your life. The reality is you are not pregnant yet. Who do you want to be? TTC can be a big part of that in this season but you are still you and you get to create the life you want in and around that.

For cycle tracking, you have the thought: lately it feels like it’s just an accumulation of information which I can’t make any sense of.  What you believe you create more of. If you keep telling yourself you don’t know what you are doing everything is going to feel confusing and frustrating. You have this data, it is your circumstance. What do you want to think about it? What other resources do you have to help you sort this all out?

You’re not the victim in your story. As Mars would say, you are the Goddess. What would your inner Goddess do?