Guilt around nourishment

TW: eating disorder and weight talk

Hello,

I have recently recovered from an eating disorder and have been used to restricting nutrition for a very long time. Whenever I give my body what it needs in terms of food (eg. I am craving a cookie, so have a cooke VS in the past craving a cookie not letting myself have one, finally giving in, having one, feeling guilty and then bingeing.) i still feel guilt. Lot’s of thoughts come into my head and it distracts me from moving on with my day. I would love help to set up a model that I could use when guilt creeps in around food, or health. Thank you.

I was thinking maybe doing an unintentional one, and then turning it into an intentional one. But don’t feel very confident about it ….

Unintentional
C: I ate a cookie
T: I will gain weight
F: guilt
A: procrastinating, obessing over food
R: more guilt

intentional
C: I ate a cookie
T: I am nourishing my body or everything is okay
F: Compassion or self love
A: Moving on with my day
R: developping a healthier relationship with my self or a step further on my recovery journey?

Thank you so much
xxxxx

 

 

Answer:

Why is it a problem if you gain weight? What does your brain tell you is going to happen? What does it mean about you if you gain weight? Pull out some thoughts here so you can look at them. The thing we are most afraid of is a feeling, an uncomfortable emotion. Your brain is just offering you guilt now in an attempt to prevent what emotion in the future?

In your first model, your result is you lose yourself. You aren’t a whole person you are reducing yourself to food and fat cells. It understandable that your brain is doing this, it’s very well practiced at it. You can have compassion for your brain and also know that it’s lying to you. What you choose to put in your mouth is one small part of your day. Perhaps you could explore instead of thinking positive thoughts about food you just don’t think about it much at all.

What else is interesting about you? What are you excited about in your life? Redirect there and see what shifts. Don’t forget to celebrate your win of coming here with your question that is evidence you believe you can let go of this way of thinking. Congratulations, friend.