Hating job now I’m out of survival mode, feeling stuck

For context I graduated from a performance degree in 2019 – which was a huge shock to the system not least because of being confronted with the reality of how to make a living. I’d accepted that teaching at least part time would have to feature in my portfolio career, as its a regular form of income and generally expected that most people in my industry teach to support themselves.

After graduating I went straight into a really intense teaching job with a long commute and a very difficult work environment. I never stopped to consider how I really felt about it because I was just grateful to be earning. After three years I realised the job was severely affecting my mental health and I left in February of this year.

Since leaving I’ve taken on a number of other teaching jobs – all more pleasant in terms of commute and environment. But I’ve noticed that these new jobs make me almost as unhappy as the last one.

I’m trying to assess – is it my thoughts that are the issue and need looking at (I have tried thought work here but find it hard to get into it). My worry here being that it wouldn’t matter what I was doing perhaps unhappiness would follow because of specific thought patterns. Or I’m wondering – now that I’m no longer in survival mode I’m just realising and noticing that teaching really doesn’t suit me. And that the teaching is the issue. Maybe both are true?

Currently there’s not enough performing engagements in my diary for me to support myself. I’m pursuing other avenues of income for myself besides teaching, but in the meantime will have to continue to teach. I’m wondering how best to support myself, and how to lessen the extent I feel overwhelmed and miserable when teaching.

Answer:

The reason you feel unhappy isn’t your job or teaching. It’s your thoughts around it. This doesn’t mean that you have to change anything if you don’t want to though…it’s perfectly okay to not like teaching. But, if you choose to stay there so your income level stays reliable, it would be worthwhile to take a look at the thoughts that are creating your dissatisfaction and decide what you want to do about it.

When it comes to supporting yourself, the first step is always learning how to accept and love yourself where you are with this situation. When you can come from a place of loving and accepting yourself (which may sound like, “I don’t like teaching, and I feel really empowered when I acknowledge that,” or something of that nature), you open doors to get curious about how to navigate a less than ideal situation with an ideal level of compassion for yourself.

What can you think to cultivate self-acceptance and love in this situation? How would you approach your job if you felt this love for yourself even in a situation that you dislike?