Help with model

Hi,
This week I had a situation which upset me with my mum. I tried to model it and use the intentional model which definitely helped – can you take a look at my models? Thanks

C Mum replies to an email sounding like she doesn’t want us to stay in half term.
T She doesn’t want to spend time with us
F Unloved
A Reply saying we won’t go. Have feelings of resentment.
R We don’t go to stay.

C Mum replies to an email sounding like she doesn’t want us to stay in half term.
T Mum finds it difficult to proritise her close relationships
F Compassion
A Reply with flexibility and understanding
R We make a plan B and spend time together.

Answer:

Well done for using the model to help you navigate a situation that upset you!
First, your circumstances are close to factual, but the “sounding like” bit is subjective. Try this on:

• C: Mum wrote…”____________” in an email

Do you see the difference? It’s minor, but nobody could argue what your mum wrote in the email…because they can read it.

Second, your R line in the first model could use a tune up: “Continue to believe that she doesn’t want to spend time with us and stay in this model.”

I would say that your R line in your intentional model is pretty spot on, but would tweak it a bit to say, “I prioritise my relationship and spending time with my mother no matter what she struggles with.” It’s basically the same thing…with a twist. Well done!
How are you finding living into your intentional model? Has anything felt sticky? Let us know how we can help in a follow up submission titled, “Mum and half term pt. 2”.