I don’t like people looking at me 2

I just understood the question that was asked, “am I safe here?” I watched the suggested video and didn’t really understand the correlation, until today, when I was exploring another topic that I’m getting coaching on. I didn’t understand that I was perceiving outside as an unsafe space. The people that might look at me were not safe either, in my mind. The worry or fear of them looking at me is a fear of being judged and for not being allowed to be outside or noticed. I see how this comes up in other areas in my life. I want to create safety for myself and allow myself to be seen. When I’m activated, my brain’s defense gets quite literal and warns me of people looking at me. It’s actually a fear of how I’m being perceived but that is not even something that I could know. It’s a waste of energy. Yesterday I took a walk and just reminded myself that I was walking because I wanted to and I wanted to enjoy the sights around me. There were people around but I told myself they didn’t matter. They were out walking for their reasons. I felt moments of unease but I finished my walk. It is something that I can enjoy practicing more regularly, and it doesn’t have to take much time.

 

 

Answer:

Beautiful insights. Isn’t it wonderful how answers come as we just keep living our lives and practicing awareness and compassion? Keep gently exploring this. Your new practice sounds perfect. How can you make walking easy? How can you support yourself on days you don’t want to go? How can you support yourself on days that you do feel judged and noticed?

The only thought I want to bring your attention to is this one: It’s a waste of energy.  Take a journal and write down all the ways not feeling safe outside served you. How is your nervous system doing exactly what it’s designed to do? How has your experience been just what you needed to get you to today? Try some radical self love. You’ve got this. It’s more fun when you love your way through it.