Indecision and too many things to do

I’m trying to slow down a bit. I am retired and I feel that I am still rushing around like I used to do when the children were small and I was at work. I have quite a few hobbies and do some volunteering as well as having a house and a husband. One problem I have is prioritising. I have always felt that everything on my list is important and in particular I can’t decide what I should do next. For instance after breakfast I might think I’ll do gardening or I’ll practice my saxophone or I could/should go for a walk, or I haven’t done my exercise video for ages, or I could clean something in the house, or even heaven forbid do my jigsaw or read a book (although those are not really allowed in the morning).

I would like to be able to take my time and decide what I want to do, but can’t really decide.

C – Too many thoughts about what to do
T – I don’t know what to do next.
F – Confusion
S – Head too full
A – Do a bit of something and then do a bit of something else
R – Don’t achieve or complete anything

 

 

Answer:

Thank you for this question. Your model looks great. We would suggest that you take another look at your circumstance. It should be simply facts.  “Too many” is subjective.  You could try something like C: I notice myself thinking…    or C: It took me 27 minutes from breakfast ending to beginning my first activity of the day. YOu can also try a more specific event that can illustrate your experience when making choices.

It’s interesting how in your action you say that you do a bit of this and a bit of something else and you have as your result “I don’t achieve or complete anything.”  Try taking a step back and questioning that.  Is it true? Is it useful? What happens when you put that result in your thought line? How often do you notice yourself saying that sentence in your mind? In what ways do you judge how you spend your time.  The first step is always awareness and compassion.  Do some exploring and see what you find.

You may also want to explore your beliefs about what retirement should look like. Any time we have life transitions or identity shifts, it can take a bit to adjust. What if this is just the part where you let yourself figure this out?