Job application for friends company

Dear coaches,
I have just put out an unsolicited application as an online fitness coach in the company of my fitness-coach. I LOVE her company and how she runs it, herself as a person and I would really like to become a part of it. I know a lot something about the backgrounds as my best friend works for her since a few months and let me know a lot about the job and everything around it. I also talked with herself about her longterm plans to grow the company in June when she was in my city. There she also mentioned that she could imagine working with me.

I think there is a lot to unpack in the background which I am not yet aware of that will show itself in the process. But right now I am proud of myself for putting myself out there and asking for what I want – with the possibility of being “rejected”. I am not sure how I will handle that, because even if I know all the rational reasons why she could reject my application – I already feel in my nails how I will make it about me and how it is because I am “not enough” or not “accepted”. I know she usually responds quickly and makes fast decisions – the possible cases I think are 1.yes, lets work together, when can you start? 2. Sorry, not now, maybe another time I will come back to you. or 3. I don’t think you and my company are a good fit or something along those lines (scaaaary).

I would love some guidance on how to “deal” with these and if you have them, also throw your questions at me about what in this makes me so invested and emotional and jittery about it. Thank you in advance!

 

Answer:

 

The jitters make total sense – feeling vulnerable can create this sense of a lack of security! Very human.

I know you know this, but…just because someone says no doesn’t mean that you’re not good enough – that’s a low quality thought that your brain offers you because it has practiced that. But knowing that it’s the first place your brain will go is so helpful – it’s information about a habit, and information is powerful.

What I’m curious about is whether you believe that you can set yourself up for success in any of the scenarios  you’ve thought about, including the one where your brain serves up trash on a platter? What do you already know about yourself that will support you no matter what? When you can count on yourself doing really habitual things, what scaffolding can you create to make it easier to (a) recognize the pattern, (b) interrupt it with compassion, and (c) care for yourself in the aftermath while letting yourself be messy? Lastly, create a plan for the best possible outcome too! How do you want to experience this with intention if the dream scenario comes to life?

Keep coming back for coaching. We’re rooting for you!