Job & housing disempowerment

I am feeling extremely disempowered in my housing & job circumstance.

I am currently coming out of a period of travelling & then sofa surfing. I’m renting a room with an older couple for the next 5 weeks & after that I don’t know where I’m going. This underline housing insecurity is causing me a lot of stress. I’m 27 & a lot of my friends are in similarly precarious housing situations so I’m aware it’s not entirely my fault as we are seeing the largest housing crisis in the UK at the moment which is especially effecting people of my age group. However I know people of a similar age who are in more empowered situations so I’m sure I can be too.

I’m finding it hard to get clear about who I really am & what I really want in my life. I feel this constant low mood at the moment & a lot of ambivalence & low self worth.

Throughout my 20s I have been on & off universal credit & I am currently in a cobweb of lies with the jobcentre. I told them I’ve set up my own massage business & am seeing clients so that I wouldn’t have to go into weekly meetings. I have been struggling a lot this year with PMDD & my dad recieving an alzeimers diagnosis & I feel I’ve made unwise survival based decisions. However the truth is that I dropped out of my massage course before qualifying due to mental health & have been travelling & sofa surfing since trying to meet my needs for more community & connection with people. But now I’m tired of the stress of constantly moving around & I want a base over winter.

Another challenging factor is that my partner of 1 year is in a similar situation. I’ve said I want to move to a town (where I’m currently staying) and he is not sure if he wants to live there. I’m scared to really commit to work & housing in this place incase he decides to move somewhere further away & I want to be with him. We are currently having a month of space meaning practically no communication so we can both figure out what we want & find greater self empowerment as the relationship wass becoming a bit code pendant & abusive. My question is how can I overcome my ambivalence & make empowered choices about my work & living situation?

 

Answer:

What I am reading here is that you know one thing you want: a home base over the winter. Another thing I am reading is that you know that you want to move to the town where you’re currently staying. So, from this perspective, you do know some things when it comes to what you want. When you think about having a home base in the town where you’re currently located for the winter, how do you feel? What sensations do you experience in your body? What wisdom do these responses have to offer you? Notice what thoughts come up around this exercise and come back to us for more coaching on this when you’re ready.