Massive action at work – part 2

Hi coaches, thanks for the coaching in part one of this.

I’ve reviewed how being willing to be uncomfortable could enable me to truly support myself right now and it led me down the route of considering how being willing to be uncomfortable could enable me to find ways to ask people to contribute, rather than taking on everything as something I have to do myself. This feels like quite a big deal to me, partly because there’s part of me that thinks if I don’t do things myself then I’m not doing my job properly, and also because I have been ignored before when I’ve tried to set boundaries, so I think that I’ll be ignored again in this. But even if I am ignored, if I try asking for input then I’ve still been willing to be uncomfortable, so that would be a win in a way!

I’ve done a couple of UMs to try to make sense of this.

C: Task at work which I could ask a colleague to contribute to
T: If I don’t do it myself then I’m not doing my job properly
F: Shame
S: Sinking feeling in stomach, heaviness in body
A: Don’t ask for input
Try to do the task without input or support from others
R: End up working in isolation to the point I’m not doing my job effectively

C: Task at work which I could ask a colleague to contribute to
T: They’ll probably ignore me
F: Resentful
S: Tightness in jaw
R: Don’t even give people a chance to contribute

I haven’t got as far as an IM yet, but I’m thinking that perhaps I will experiment with different ways of asking for input and from who. With some colleagues it feels quite unsafe due to history, for example one colleague previously shouted down the phone at me in response to me trying to stick to a boundary I had set, so I feel quite wary of her in general. Others will probably be more keen to get involved.

 

Answer:

Love this exploration. So many wins! Have you celebrated yourself for opening up to the possibility of making some shifts at your job? That is so powerful. Keep telling the Universe what you want. Keep questioning those default thoughts. A question Byron Katie poses is this: Who would I be without this thought?

Can you paint a picture in your mind (or maybe for real if you’d like) of what it would be like if you deleted “If I don’t do it myself then I’m not doing my job properly” from your brain?  If you could stay in full integrity with yourself and who you want to be AND not think this way, what would it look like? See what you find. Notice any obstacles your brain comes up with. This is all part of the process.