How to be equipped to respond to a work colleague who I feel intimidated by & don’t trust.
They are abrupt in their communication & then often miss the point of what I’m trying to say – I feel on defensive when spoken to in that way & makes me feel inadequate. Often I come out of a conversation feeling what I describe as bruised but don’t fully know why as sometimes its subtle put downs like you are not the finished article.
Example – when I asked a question last week they immediately jumped to why are they coming to you & not me
Model:
Circumstance – feel intimidated & don’t trust a work colleague, don’t like the way the communicate to me
Thought – I don’t like the way they interact with me
Feeling – inadequate
Action – rumination, going over what has been said along with the tone
Result – makes me want to escape & hide from the situation
Answer:
Notice in your story how you are describing your interactions with this colleague. Step back like a scientist and study the words and the tone of what you’ve said here and what you say in your mind. A thought download where you just let it all out on paper may help you see what’s happening. Then you’ll want to separate your thoughts from facts.
You’ve done a great putting this model together but you will get more clarity if you just make one simple shift: Make your circumstance only facts. Perhaps something from your last interaction. What did they say exactly? Take yourself out of your head and out of their head and just present it.
Giving yourself this separation is the first step to equipping yourself on how you want to respond. Bring back any questions or models for more coaching and we’ll coach you through the next step which is taking your power back.
C: colleague said “you are not finished the article”
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