Thank you for your answer. I like the idea of “gracious space”. When the other persons were talking about me (instead of to me), I could have simply said: “Is there anything you would like to tell me?” In general, I want to speak up for myself more often (also in other settings). My go-to response has often been to ignore comments (in the past, because I was easily defeated and thought “what’s the point anyway”), which sometimes can be helpful. But I also want to offer my perspective from a calm state. I used to think I have to say something very witty as response, but I guess it’s enough to reply in a calm and friendly way that makes the other person consider their behavior or their way of saying something.
I’m also very grateful for the community at the stable. There have been some tensions and I had very little capacities left last year (also due to other things going on in my life). So I guess I want to enjoy the community, speak up for myself in a calm and friendly way, and, if I choose to ignore comments, I want to ignore them intentionally / from an empowered place.
I’d seen myself as helpless recently also due to some challenges at work, but I’ve realized that I also did stand up for myself and said something in situations that were challenging. I thought about it and spacious grace means showing compassion to both myself and other persons (not only at the stable) and trusting my abilities to handle different situations. Thank you!
Answer:
Lovely insights. What model would you need to be in to be able to take the action of replying in a calm and friendly way? What Result would that create for you?
C: people at stable say xyz
T: ?
F: ?
S:
A: I reply in a calm and friendly way. I don’t spiral after the conversation, what else do you do or not do?
R: ?
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