Taking on new tasks

I work alongside my husband in our own business. I have my tasks, he has his tasks. He works full time in this business and I work part-time alongside caring for our kids.
Our business is growing and my husband would like to pass more tasks onto me. Initially I’m all for this but it’s not long before I feel dread and guilt about messing things up. I then try and forget about the task or quickly pass it back to him. I’ve had a go at my first model to try and help me with this.

Unintentional Model
C: husband asks me to take on a new task
T: I’m not capable of doing this
F: Dread
A:procrastination, don’t do it, pass it back.
R: I don’t do it

Intentional model
C; husband asks me to take on a new task
T: I have the right skills for this
F: focused
A: research the task, test/try things out/ask for help from others if needed
R : I’ve completed the task

I know where I want to get too but struggling to implement my intentional model.

 

Answer:

This was a great first model. Well done. Let’s take a look at your R-lines. These are always directly connected to your T-lines. So, in your UM, I’d guess that the result you create is that you create ways to validate the belief that you are not capable of doing the task. In your IM, I’d guess that the R you create is that you believe in your skill set so much that you find ways to get it done, even if you don’t know how to do it right away.

If we find that we are having trouble living into or implementing our intentional model, it’s because the leap is too great from our UM – very few people can leap across an entire river in one jump – I’m a rock hopper myself! This gives us a chance to take smaller steps with lower stakes. These are called bridge thoughts (because they help bridge the gap to your IM). Try creating an intentional model with a thought that starts with one of the following: “It’s possible…” “I’m learning to…” “I’m becoming a person who…” “Maybe…”

When you consider these kinds of thoughts, take note of how you feel and whether what you do changes if you come from a different emotional place. Bring it back to us for more coaching (and keep up with the models! You’re doing great!).