The audacity of getting what I want

I got a new company phone yesterday. I just love it, it has the perfect size for my hand and also has a case with a really nice feel.

I am thinking of buying the same model as my personal phone. This (and writing an AAC about it) seems really exaggerated and unnecessary though. Some people have REAL problems in this world, I have some more “serious” things to get coached about and to figure out. And yet, here I am.

I bought my personal phone two years ago, so it hasn’t quite reached its “expiration date” yet, in my opinion. It just sounds crazy to me to buy a phone and spend so much money on it, just because it FEELS good. I didn’t like my current phone from the start, but it wasn’t possible to return it and I kind of got used to it.

I’m also questioning if the only reason I want it is because I want something “new and shiny” and if I use it to distract myself from more serious issues that I feel not ready to face.

What I do notice though is that I tend to stay in situations that I don’t feel great in. They are not horrible, but they are also not great and I might be able to do better.

 

Answer:

Thank you for this question. There will be many people who relate but haven’t written in.  Why is it audacious to get a new phone that you like? Why is audacious to get a new phone before your old one expires/dies/breaks? Why is it a problem to be audacious?

I had to go look up the definition of the word and one is “showing a willingness to take surprisingly bold risks” What definition does your brain have?

So what if you want something new and shiny? You are an adult and you get to decide what you do with your money. You get to buy things for any reason. You can not buy things for any reason. Check in with your nervous system…does it feel dangerous in some way to buy a phone?

You’re on to something with your exploration at the end of your question. Keep asking good questions. Keep loving yourself. The phone is the circumstance. Isn’t it beautiful all the opportunities this new work phone is bringing up for you?