Transition days

I’m in my second month of cycle tracking, and I feel so much more in tune with my cycle.

I’ve noticed both months I felt detached, numb, disconnected and spacey on my transition between winter and spring. I was thrilled to be able to identify this, and it made being gentle on myself much easier.

I looked back in Period Power and also searched for “translation” in the replays, but would appreciate some guidance on unpicking the hormonal changes that cause these feelings.

In period power, Maisie mentions (to paraphrase) it might be an apprehension of not feeling ready to move out of winter if you feel unequipped for the energy of spring. I have started to feel more at home during my winter, but my detached feeling doesn’t fit with this description right now.

Mini-Maisie on my shoulder is asking

– does it matter why?
– what happens if you sit with the uncomfortable feeling?

I want to know what is going on hormonally to cause me to feel like this to help me accept it deeply, and my T in this situation is “I’m doing something wrong to make myself feel like this, it’s my own fault”. But then am I just seeking reassurance when actually I need to be resourceful and plan ahead for next month for this transition to be supported by lots of nourishing and exquisite self care opportunities and time to journal, thought download and really explore into sitting with these uncomfortable physical and emotional feelings.

– what happens this cycle when I’ve tried to sit with the feelings is that I’m reminded of very low times when I’ve had periods of depression and anxiety seemingly triggered (although not entirely caused by) significant hormonal changes – namely stopping breastfeeding my eldest daughter, and conceiving my youngest daughter. It feels like a very physical “chemical” experience, my whole body feels different at an almost cellular level, and I want to climb out of my own skin.

I am still having fortnightly psychology with the clinician whom I saw first with the perinatal mental health service, however I’d really appreciate an opinion on the hormonal aspects of the transition I’ve described, and if these anyway to support my cycle and hormonal levels at this point of my cycle.

I should add I have had a copper coil for just over a year (youngest daughter now 18 months old) and this is the first time since I was 16 I’ve not been on hormonal birth control. My cycle returned about 3 months ago.

Thank you so much.

 

Answer:

What I am seeing here is the thought, “If I know what’s going on hormonally then I can deeply accept how I feel.” Why is your deep acceptance of how you feel conditional upon what you know?

What makes being able to feel feelings like detached, numb, disconnected and spacey during your transition days with acceptance or with more compassion for yourself isn’t knowing what your hormones are doing, it’s what you think about the hard feelings themselves. And when you think, “I’m doing this to myself,” it’s no wonder that it’s hard to accept what’s going on.

Knowing this, and without needing to know more to get started, what thought or thoughts can you create that would bring you one step closer to deeply, gently, and lovingly accepting how you feel during these transition days?
You can bring back what you discover as you explore those questions for more coaching, and this could also be a great post for the community as I’m sure other members would love to discuss transition days.