Turning 30

Hi,

I am turning 30 next week, and for a while now (I wanna say the last 2-3 years actually), I have had this agonising sneaky feeling creep up on me- which is very much related to me turning 30. It seems to be bringing up everything to the surface and I don’t know how to tackle it because it’s bringing with it an overwhelming feeling of anxiety and dread. I am a songwriter signed to a publisher, and 5 months ago me and my partner decided to move to London for more opportunities. Ive been busy creating a network so far. I’m in between management but I’m working on finding the right new team. I mention this because I feel like it’s relevant to me turning 30. Before in my twenties I could lean on the “I’m still figuring it out” phrase, but that doesn’t work as well now. I feel like I haven’t gotten as far as I wish I had by this age, and I feel embarrassed when people ask me how old I am. Like I’ve caught out. I am also slowly running out of money from my publishing deal, and I continually find that I’m having to actively not feel like a loser. I feel like my youth is slipping away, and that I’m running out of time. I really wish I felt empowered, courages and proud instead of anxious, embarrassed and depressed. I guess I’ll start there. I would love some coaching on this issue, to start unravelling it all and work with this in a constructive way. Thanks

 

 

Answer:

Birthday wishes to you! You’ve got some great awareness of why turning thirty brings up anxiety and dread. The way we tackle what you’re feeling is to separate thoughts from facts. Thoughts can feel really true so taking a step back will help you be able to see what’s happening.

Facts:

I am turning 30 next week,

I am a songwriter signed to a publisher

5 months ago me and my partner moved to London

 I don’t have a manager

Thoughts: everything else.

Take some of these thoughts and put them into models. Notice what feelings you are creating, notice how you show up in your career when you think this way, and see what results you are getting. You don’t need to change anything. Don’t try to skip to the part where you love being 30. Just notice how your brain is offering you a story where you are a loser who’s running out of time. Sometimes our brain is not very kind. The key is to not believe everything you think.  See what comes up as you spend some time right where you are, and bring any questions that come up back to ask a coach.