Wanting a friend to go on holiday with

Dear coaches, the last two years I went on holiday with a friend of mine. I was very happy that I found someone to go on holiday with as that’s something I’d really missed in previous years. However, I’m becoming more aware that I often don’t feel comfortable around that friend. It’s almost like she wants to degrade / belittle me. I haven’t seen her in a while because I needed some distance but today I asked if she wanted to go for a walk. And I again had the impression that she wants to make me look small, naive, etc. I really tried to be open, but I felt like I couldn’t say anything without her making it mean something about me. Now I have the dilemma that I would like to have someone to go on holiday with but, at the same time, I don’t want to feel comfortable around her. When I’m with a friend I don’t want to feel like I have to constantly monitor every sentence I say. I would appreciate any advice!

Answer:

 Your brain thinks you’ve got a big problem and it thinks there are only two solutions. What do you think they are? That simply isn’t true. Let’s get you unstuck by doing a brainstorm of all the ways you could address this goal of going on a comfortable holiday with a friend.  Think outside the box. Don’t judge or edit your ideas. Have a bit of fun with it.

If you felt powerful in this situation, what would you do? Who would you be? What model are you in now that is keeping you stuck?

See what comes up and come back for more coaching.