Why’s it so hard to just make a decision ?

UIM
Circumstance: booked to go to a 3 day conference next week where I’m also speaking and mentoring a student
Thought: should I cancel going given how tired I am and that our cat just died?
Feeling: unsure, anxious
Sensation: nervous tingling in chest
Action: ruminating, being indecisive
Result: keep coming back to having to decide

IM
Circumstance: booked to go to a 3 day conference next week where I’m also speaking and mentoring a student
Thought: I can arrange for someone else to mentor student and it’s ok to cancel my talk when I’m exhausted, grieving and prioritising being with my autistic son when he’s grieving the loss and needs extra support
Feeling: still a bit torn
Sensation: irritated with myself – just decide not to go ffs
Action: thought download on what’s really stopping me from pulling out summarised as it’s so hard just to stop and prioritise self care when I’ve been on a whirlwind train steaming ahead through so much for such a long time
Result: ask a coach

Answer:

We’re so glad you brought your question here. Big win to reach out when you’re feeling stuck. We’re so sorry about your cat, sending love to you and your family.

When we do models, we get more clarity by keeping them simple. For any given circumstance you will have many thoughts and feelings. Pick one thought at a time to put in a model, and stay focused on that thought only.  If your thought is a questions, answer it.

Should you cancel? Or a more powerful question is Do I want to cancel?  What is most important to you right now? Where do you want to put your energy?  What if it’s ok to want to be in two places at once? You can feel torn and also make a decision and move forward. Just bring torn with you. it’s not a problem.

Whatever you choose, trust that you’ll take care of yourself. What would that look like for you?